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Buying a toy, a crib or a car seat is not just a question of choosing the one you like best. You often must also consider your child`s safety.

”The parent today is subjected to a marketing blitz. It`s almost impossible for the uninformed parent to make a decision on a product,” says consumer activist Jack Gillis, known best for ”The Car Book,” which has told thousands about the safety and performance of their autos.

In a new book, Gillis and Mary Ellen R. Fise, both of whom have young children, highlight the best and the worst child-oriented products and services. Their recommendations, both general and brand-specific, are contained in ”The Childwise Catalog” (Pocket Books, $6.95).

Unless it makes news as a recall or because it has harmed a child, the parent almost never hears about what products are dangerous to young children, or about what to look for.

”Retailers have no incentive to advertise which products are unsafe,”

Gillis said. ”Most of the unsafe toys are imported, but it`s the retailers who buy them. The only requirement is in age labeling on toys with small parts.”

Despite this requirement, not all such toys are labeled, as Gillis demonstrated with a toy called ”Fudgesicles,” toy ice cream pops the size of one`s thumb. The ice cream and the stick components came apart and the whole unit failed what Gillis called the no-choke test.

He placed it in a testing tube that simulates a child`s windpipe and it went in completely.

”If a toy fits into this tube entirely, it is hazardous for children under 3,” Gillis said.

”Theoretically, the Consumer Product Safety Commission should ensure safety, but with deregulation, CPSC has pulled back in the past few years,”

he said.

Gillis, who works with the consumer lobbying group Consumer Federation of America, said he feels retailers have a responsibility for the products they sell.

He lauds companies that do take steps to protect the consumers.

”Stores such as Zayre conduct in-house testing on all the products they sell,” he said. ”Mattel (the toy company) voluntarily has coated all small parts on its toys with barium so the parts will show up on an X-ray if they`re swallowed.

”Fisher Price has designed a roller skate that with a switch will not roll backwards. The skate is a creative, clever, concerned design that is simple and not expensive,” Gillis said.

”I believe that the manufacturers of more expensive products tend to be the more safety-oriented. However, that`s not to say the less expensive products shouldn`t be safer.”

Gillis, who next tells consumers about the banking industry in ”The Bank Book,” also criticized manufacturers and retailers of items such as home fingerprinting kits, which he said take advantage of parents` fears about child abduction.

”It is difficult for parents to get a really good print. Fingerprinting should be done by the police or a professional,” he said.

”The Childwise Catalog” does more than point out the potential dangers of products, however. It also contains suggestions for parents looking for pediatricians or child-care facilities, how to travel with children and safety tips.

”We want this to be the parents` companion book to Dr. Spock,” Gillis said.

”Parents who come across dangerous products should report them to the Consumer Product Safety Commission,” Gillis said of the panel that decides on product recall.

”And parents should vote with their dollars. The more who do, the more impact there will be.” —