In June, 1915, O`Keeffe had left New York City after studying for nine months at Teachers College, Columbia University. She returned to
Charlottesville to teach summer school at the University of Virginia and then took a teaching position at Columbia College, Columbia, S.C. (O`Keeffe`s idiosyncratic punctuation and erratic use of apostrophes has been retained in the following selections to preserve the character of the original handwritten letters.)
TO ANITA POLLITZER
Charlottesville, 25 August 1915
Dear Anita:
Thank you for calling me Pat. I like it-It always seemed funny that we called one another Miss.
Your letters are certainly like drinks of fine cold spring water on a hot day-They have a spark of the kind of fire in them that makes life worthwhile- That nervous energy that makes people like you and I want and go after everything in the world-bump our heads on all the hard walls and scratch our hands on all the briars-but it makes living great-doesn`t it?-I`m glad I want everything in the world-good and bad-bitter and sweet-I want it all and a lot of it too-Your letter makes me think that life is almost as good to you as it is to me. I was pretty grumpy when College was over-was tired-got as thin as a rail at summer school but I gained eleven pounds and a half the first two weeks-Anyway-I`m feeling like a human being-and thinking all the world is fine again-
Then 291 (a periodical published by Alfred Stieglitz), came and I was so crazy about it that I sent for Number 2 and 3-and I think they are great-They just take my breath away-it is almost as good as going to 291. I subscribed to it-it was too good to let it go by-I got Floyd Dell`s ”Women as World Builders” a few days ago and got quite excited over it.
Anita-talking of 291-and New York-I am afraid I`ll not be there. Maybe you can help me decide. I have a position in Columbia College-South Carolina-I don`t want it-I want to go back to N.Y. I have a notion that I want to go back to the college but I`m not sure-what do you think? I want to show Mr. Martin
(a Columbia University professor and artist) what I`ve been doing and see what he says about it. I think I would have time to work down there by myself but noboby will be interested-
I am just doing what I want to. Painting on a mass of trees against the mountains and sky from 4:30 to 6 evenings and in between am just doing what I feel like-Walk for about two hours before breakfast-read for two after that-then have the rest of the day-I don`t always work-except about an hour-guess I`ve done something every day-Have been sewing too-making undergarments- it is lots of fun when you haven`t had time to sew for so long.
I was trying to get fat and make a nice realistic landscape-I was getting such twists in my head from doing as I pleased that it is almost impossible to come down to earth.
Lovingly-
Georgia-
TO ANITA POLLITZER
Columbia, S.C., 11 October 1915
Anita
-arent you funny to wonder if I like your letters. I was walking up from the little bandbox post office with the mail under my arm-reading your letter this afternoon-and when I came to the part telling what Stieglitz said about ”it`s worth going to Hell to get there”-I laughed aloud-and dropped all the things under my arm
Anita-do you know-I believe I would rather have Steiglitz like something- anything I had done-than anyone else I know of-I have always thought that-If I ever make anything that satisfies me even ever so little-I am going to show it to him to find out if its any good-Don`t you often wish you could make something he might like?
Still Anita-I dont see why we ever think of what others think of what we do-no matter who they are-isn`t it enough just to express yourself-If it were to a particular person as music often is-of course we would like them to understand-at least a little-but why should we care about the rest of the crowd-If I make a picture to you why should I care if anyone else likes it or is interested in it or not I am getting a lot of fun out of slaving by myself- The disgusting part is that I so often find myself saying-what would you-or Dorothy-or somebody-most anybody-say if they saw it-It is curious-how one works for flattery-
Rather it is curious how hard it seems to be for me right now not to cater to someone when I work-rather than just to express myself
During the summer-I didn`t work for anyone-I just sort of went mad usually-I wanted to say ”Let them all be damned-I`ll do as I please”-It was vacation after the winter-but-now-remember Ive only been working a week-I find myself catering to opinion again-and I think I`ll just stop it.
Pat.
Saturday night.
TO ANITA POLLITZER
Columbia, SC, 20? October 1915
Anita-it has been wonderful weather down here-it would hardly be possible to tell you how much I`ve enjoyed it-All the little undergrowth in the woods has turned bright-and above-way up high-the pines-singing-It makes me love everybody I love at all-almost a hundred times more-It is wonderful-Thanks for all your trouble about the picture-I sent it-but am having it sent back to me- because after it was framed there was something-two things to be exact-that I wanted to change-It makes little difference to me whether it gets in or not- it is not particularly satisfying to me-I only sent it because I had made up my mind to when Dorothy sent it back to me.
Anita? What is Art-anyway?
When I think of how hopelessly unable I am to answer that question I cannot help feeling like a farce-pretending to teach anybody anything about it-I won`t be able to keep at it long Anita-or I`ll lose what little self respect I have-unless I can in some way solve the problem a little-give myself some little answer to it-What are we trying to do-what is the excuse for it all-If you could sit down and do just exactly what you wanted to right now for a year-what in the dickens would you do-The things Ive done that satisfy me most are charcoal landscapes-and-things-the colors I seem to want to use absolutely nauseate me-
I don`t mean to complain-I am really quite enjoying the muddle-and am wondering if I`ll get anything out of it and if I do what it will be-I decided I wasn`t going to cater to what anyone else might like-why should I-and when you leave that element out of your work there is nothing much left
You asked me about music-I like it better than anything in the world-Color gives me the same thrill once in a long long time-I can almost remember and count the times-it is usually just the outdoors or the flowers-or a person-sometimes a story-or something that will call a picture to my mind-will affect me like music-
Do you think we can ever get much of it in Art-I don`t know-anything about anything-and Anita Im afraid I never will.
The sky is just dripping today and it seems I have never seen or felt anything more perfectly quiet.
Lots of love to you Anita
-Georgia O`Keeffe
TO ANITA POLLITZER
Columbia, SC December 13-
1915
Dear Anita-Did you ever have something to say and feel as if the whole side of the wall wouldn`t be big enough to say it on and then sit down on the floor and try to get it on to a sheet of charcoal paper-and when you had put it down look at it and try to put into words what you have been trying to say with just marks-and then-wonder what it all is anyway-Ive been crawling around on the floor till I have cramps in my feet-one creation looks too much like T.C. (Teachers College) the other too much like soft soap-Maybe the fault is with what Im trying to say-I dont seem to be able to find words for it-
I always have a hard time finding words for anything-
Anita-I wonder if I am a raving lunatic for trying to make these things-You know-I don`t care if I am-but I do wonder sometimes.
Georgia
Monday night.
Pollitzer wrote to O`Keeffe describing her visit to Stieglitz`s gallery 291 during which she had showed him several of O`Keeffe`s 1915 charcoal drawings to Stieglitz. Pollitzer quoted Stieglitz as saying of the charcoals, ”Why they`re genuinely fine things-you say a woman did these-She`s an unusual woman-She`s broad-minded, she`s bigger than most women, but she`s got the senitive emotion-I`d know she was a woman. . ..Tell her. . .they`re the purest, finest, sincerest things that have entered 291 in a long while. . .I wouldn`t mind showing them in one of these rooms one bit-perhaps I shall.”
TO ANITA POLLITZER
Columbia, SC, 4 January 1916
Dear Anita:
There seems to be nothing for me to say except Thank you-very calmly and quietly. I could hardly believe my eyes when I read your letter this aternoon- I haven`t been working-except one night-all during the holidays-that night I worked till nearly morning-The thing seems to express in a way what I want it to but-it also seems rather effeminate-it is essentially a womans feeling- satisfies me in a way-I dont know whether the fault is with the execution or with what I tried to say-Ive doubted over it-and wondered over it till I had just about decided it wasnt any use to keep on amusing myself ruining perfectly good paper trying to express myself-I wasn`t even sure that I had anything worth expressing-There are things we want to say-but saying them is pretty nervy-What reason have I for getting the notion that I want to say something and must say it-Of course marks on paper are free-free speech-press- pictures-all go together I suppose-but I was just feeling rather downcast about it-and it is so nice to feel that I said something to you-and to Stieglitz
I wonder what I said-I wonder if any of you got what I tried to say-Isn`t it damnable that I cant talk to you If Steiglitz says any more about them-ask why he liked them-
Anyway, Anita-it makes me want to keep on-and I had almost decided that it was a fool`s game-Of course I would rather have something hang in 291 than anyplace in New York-but wanting things hung is simply wanting your vanity satisfied-of course it sounds good but what sounds best to me is that he liked them-I don`t care so much about the rest of it-only I would be interested in knowing what people get out of them-if they get anything-Wouldn`t it be a great experiment-I`ll just not even imagine such luck-but I`ll keep working-anyway-
I am glad you showed the things to Stieglitz-but how on earth am I ever going to thank you or get even with you-I love these Nadelman (sculptor Elie Nadelman whose drawings and sculptures were on exhibit at 291 at the time)
things too Anita-I just have too many things to thank you for tonight-I`ll just have to stop and not try
Goodnight.
Georgia.
