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Some years before nightclub performers started screeching the lyrics of

”New York, New York,” they were wont to sing softer, more lyrical tributes to Gotham.

This winter-though no one is likely to apply the terms ”soft” or

”lyrical” to the city-there has been a softening on the gastronomic front that only can please an out-of-town visitor.

The ”in” look for culinary New York is casual, and restaurant owners at least are pretending to love being informal, unpretentious and bargain-conscious. While most upscale French dining spots are keeping an

uncharacteristically low profile or claiming to be bistros, Italian-American culinary relations never have been closer. With New Yorkers consuming great quantities of pasta daily at any number of trattorias, grills and cafes, it`s tempting to think of Manhattan as Milan on the Hudson.

Having lost a goodly number of customers, these same owners have begun to regard them as a precious commodity. Reservations are easier to come by, greetings can be almost effusive, waiters actually make eye contact when they take orders and seem more attentive to diners` needs and desires.

Prices have stopped escalating and in some cases actually have declined. As a result, salaries and staffs have been cut at some restaurants, and chefs are bringing forth simpler dishes that require less intricate preparation.

Still, the only way to make a visit to New York seem a bargain is to go first to Milan, London or Paris.

Among established institutions that still are strong draws: The Four Seasons, Lutece, Le Bernardin, Montrachet, Chanterelle, Sign of the Dove, the River Cafe, La Cote Basque and the wonderfully refurbished Rainbow Room. Bouley, featuring chef-owner David Bouley`s contemporary cuisine, is the most recent restaurant to earn (deservedly) one of the New York Times` rare four-star ratings.

Less formal very popular choices include the Union Square Cafe, Cafe des Artists, the Russian Tea Room, Gotham Bar and Grill, Felidia, Sparks Steak House, the Post House, Cent` Anni and the Carnegie Deli.

For those seeking to explore outside this mainstream, a recent dining tour of the city revealed some intriguing possibilities.

Remi

To begin with something Italian, let`s join Midtown`s beautiful people and try Remi. On West 53rd Street between 6th and 7th Avenues, this new restaurant is a candidate for pre- or post-theater dining or lunch before or after a visit to the Museum of Modern Art. Bright, beautiful, casual and moderately priced-a triumph of Italian style (Venice is the inspiration) with some substance to the menu-it touches all the right trend buttons.

It also could pass as a design museum. A long, narrow room with a dramatic 25 feet between floor and ceiling, its curved west wall (covered with a mural of Venice), mastlike central pillar and appointments suggest a ship. The display of Venetian glass behind the bar is breathtaking.

An area of tables to the left near the entrance suggests the Italian equivalent of Siberia. Otherwise there`s not a bad seat in the house. (The shape of the room can make it hard to spot your waiter, however, and cause hot food to cool on the voyage from stove to table.)

The pasta and fish categories are the places to begin in choosing from a menu that is relatively brief but nicely varied. There`s a daily risotto special, tuna and swordfish in one or more forms. Plan on about $75 for lunch for two with a glass of wine. Make it $100 at dinner.

Remi, 1325 Avenue of the Americas (entrance on 53rd Street in midblock), 212-581-4242.

Tribeca Grill

Dining at the Tribeca Grill is going to be more of an investment because of a double-digit cab fare from Midtown to a surprisingly agreeable stretch of Greenwich Avenue a few blocks north of the World Trade Center. But it won`t cost more than a movie for two, and on arrival you may, just may, see more stars here than you would on the silver screen.

The restaurant is on the ground floor of a warehouse in which Robert De Niro has created a film-production center for Hollywood directors working in New York. De Niro is a partner in the Grill, as are Sean Penn, Bill Murray, Mikhail Baryshnikov and other gossip-column regulars.

Some of them are here sometimes. Crowds are here all the time, yet the place feels cozy.

Managing partner Drew Nieporent (the remarkably genial man who made Montrachet a success) seems to consider each party and each table important and has transmitted this unusual democratic attitude to his staff.

Chef Don Pintabona`s menu is relatively sparse: only eight appetizers and seven main courses, plus four kinds of fish, any of which will be grilled, sauteed or roasted to order. (If your choice is salmon, ask for it sauteed on a bed of spinach.)

The descriptions are straightforward, perhaps too much so. How can you tell that behind the words ”lobster gazpacho” waits a rich red, delightfully spicy soup garnished with avocado and fried noodles? That ”thick-cut grilled calf`s liver” will be moist and silken? That potato pancakes ”Vonnas,” a tribute named for the home of French chef Georges Blanc, will be feather-light, star-kissed silver dollars?

The tab for a three-course meal for two, including a bottle from the moderately priced wine list, could be $120 with tax and tip. The lunch menu is briefer and priced lower.

Tribeca Grill, 375 Greenwich St., 212-941-3900. Reservations essential.

An American Place

In several days of tasting, nowhere did the flavors announce themselves more clearly nor ring more true than at An American Place.

Chef-owner Larry Forgione is one of the heroes of the movement that resurrected American cooking and put it on the front burner of restaurants across the nation. A year ago he moved from a nook on upper Lexington Avenue to a large, vivid cafe space a few blocks south of Grand Central Station. En route, he shed the formality and high prices that had limited the restaurant`s appeal to well-heeled gastronomes.

At lunch, An American Place draws from nearby publishing houses. At dinner, it needs customers and deserves them. Dishes such as Carolina she-crab soup, cedar-planked Atlantic salmon, adobo-style duck wrapped in a cornmeal pancake and pan-roasted loin of lamb with goat cheese and herb crust are presented beautifully. The restaurant`s breads and rolls are distinctive, and desserts are warranted indulgences. America`s best vineyard regions are represented on the wine list.

A filling lunch for two might run $80, a three-course dinner about $100 minus beverages.

An American Place, 2 Park Ave., 212-684-2221.

Alison on Dominick Street

Would a visitor to Manhattan seek out a restaurant that makes you feel you are not in New York? I`m not sure, but there are popular hideaways to be found that do transport their customers to faraway places, and none is more

”in” at the moment than tiny Alison on Dominick Street.

The location of this made-over 19th Century townhouse truly is incongruous. It`s on a quiet, tree-lined street south of Greenwich Village directly above the ramp leading to the Holland Tunnel.

Inside, though, the only noise comes from the stylishly dressed, success- oriented, chatty customers. Seated beside and just beyond the bar or in a larger rear room with fabric decor, they are very responsive to the owner-hostess, a gracious sometime actress named Alison Price, and to their food.

The cooking is Provencal French in inspiration, modern American in execution and very satisfying. Consider roast guinea hen with a risotto containing black olives and roast tomatoes, ”thyme scented” loin of rabbit with mushroom flan, striped bass in tarragon-flavored tomato broth with couscous, a salad of lamb, lentils and orange sections, fresh fruit sorbet or a fruit tart for dessert.

At lunch, when reservations rarely are necesssary (they are at night), a three-course, prix fixe lunch is available for $19. At night, count on at least $50 a person minus beverages.

Alison on Dominick Street, 38 Dominick St., 212-787-1188.

Aureole

Back uptown, in the midst of tall buildings and even higher rents, one new upscale restaurant has defied the odds and become a runaway success. Called Aureole, it features the cooking of a talented American chef, Charles Palmer, and an international cast of flashy, fun-seeking, very-well-heeled customers. Blonds wait expectantly at the blond-wood bar. A man reaches into his coat and pulls out a cellular telephone. Fresh flowers and flowered bottles of champagne soften the sleek ambiance. Here, at least, the Bonfire of the Vanities still burns bright.

Palmer`s preparations are complex artistic statements that often turn out to be deceptively rich. Among the best: delicate scallops in ”sandwiches”

made of crisp-fried potato, a stew of lobster with lobster-mousse-filled wontons and sauteed quail legs with a slightly sweet corn-and-sweetbread pudding and earthy wild mushrooms.

Desserts are remarkable, both in construction and taste. One not to miss is the mocha cake with two mousses.

Dinner is a prix fixe of $55 for two courses. Although there are some moderately priced choices on the wine list, the bill probably will climb to $100 a person before you depart.

Aureole, 34 E. 61st St., 212-319-1660.

Chin-Chin

On Sunday evening, with most mainstream restaurants closed, many New Yorkers opt for ethnic dining. Chinese is a favorite choice, though grungy, crime-ridden Chinatown has lost some of its charm as a nighttime destination. One of the most agreeable alternatives I know is to head over to Chin-Chin, near the corner of 49th Street and 3rd Avenue. The tunnellike, modern restaurant lacks the usual overwrought Chinese decor. Only antique framed photographs of Chinese people on the two long walls suggest what the relatively limited menu makes abundantly clear: This is a place in which good taste, even artistry, is honored and the unusual is common. There are Caucasians among the serving staff, steamed rice and tea don`t appear automatically and desserts include New York cheesecake and Key lime pie. But the cooking is strictly Chinese and very good.

The adventurous might start with crunchy shredded jellyfish salad or snails in a coriander and garlic broth. But they shouldn`t be disappointed if an assortment of steamed and fried dumplings is chosen instead. Duck is a speciality, done Peking-style, tea-smoked or a l`orange. Keep eating and you can count on spending about $80 for a generous meal for two with beer.

Chin-Chin, 216 E. 49th St., 212-888-4555.

Arcadia

For those running the boutique shopping course along Madison Avenue, gentle, charming, intimate Arcadia represents an escape at lunchtime from the maddening crowd on the sidewalks and in the shops. The pastel murals of the seasons in that fantasy land are calming, and so is the sense of being surrounded by impeccably tailored, impeccably groomed old money. Conversations tend to be magnified, however. The room is noisy.

Chef/owner Anne Rosensweig once was an anthropologist. She has studied her clientele carefully and pleases them with unpretentious presentations of pricey fresh ingredients that are good and-mostly-good for you. Consider such dishes as roasted spring onion and garlic soup or roast trout stuffed with Jerusalem artichokes and dill on a ragout of corn and tomatoes.

The food is good, though a soup may be underseasoned or rabbit overcooked. Service is excellent. Consider, finally, the price: at least $40 a person with tax and tip for an a la carte main course, dessert and coffee at lunch.

That`s a lot, especially when you discover that even in Arcadia a lot of money can`t guarantee perfection.

Arcadia, 21 E. 67th St., 212-223-2900.