The kids never had a chance this Christmas.
Early this shopping season, while unsuspecting parents were still making up lists with visions of Ninja Turtles, Barney or Barbie in their budgets, evil forces of capitalism were at work in Burbank.
A cunning Hollywood producer rolled out a killer combo TV show and toy line designed to steal the hearts and minds of any child who had ever eyed Barbie’s Dream House or bellowed, “Cowabunga!”
Marketing mastermind Haim Saban showed no mercy when he concocted a new band of irresistible superheroes from a brew consisting of:
– Ninja martial arts.
– Dinosaurs.
– Space aliens.
– Cool teenagers in spandex.
Unless you have been totally absorbed with NAFTA and GATT, it would have been hard to avoid hearing about the results of Saban’s explosive mix: the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers.
Think of them as a cosmically diverse “Beverly Hills, 90210.” Or a “Jurassic Park” for jujitsu gymnasts. The TV show, which premiered in August on Fox, is such a hit on weekdays and Saturdays that its producers have dared to crow openly about beating out Oprah Winfrey in the Los Angeles market. (In Chicago the show airs at 4:30 p.m. weekdays and 10:30 a.m. Saturdays on WFLD-Ch. 32.)
In some areas, it claims a 99 percent share of the market for kids aged 2 to 11. Five videos are available on Polygram, and a full-length feature film and a toothbrush line appear inevitable. Power Rangers mania is unchecked.
As toy action figures, the Power Rangers (made by Bandai America) are this Christmas season’s Barney/Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles/Teddy Ruxpin/Super Soaker/Nerf Bow and Arrow/Cabbage Patch Dolls and on and on back through the generations of incredibly hot toys that are totally unobtainable for the holidays except through mob infiltration.
Even the nation’s largest toy-store chain has punted.
“It is extremely difficult to find them in any of our 581 stores, but we are offering `Goof’ slips (rain checks) to people who want the Rangers but can’t find them,” said Carol Fuller, goof-apologist at the headquarters of Toys “R” Us Inc. in Paramus, N.J. “We really didn’t expect it to be as popular as it was.”
Certainly other holiday season toy phenoms have caused a stir, even the occasional riot-as when loving parents began gouging at each other’s eyes in toy stores across the country over the dorky Cabbage Patchers.
While no Ranger-related violence has been reported, stories have been circulating of shoppers perched atop toy-store rooftops with night-vision goggles in search of delivery trucks.
And men in business suits and wingtip shoes were observed sprinting shoulder-to-shoulder through the aisles of a Lombard Toys “R” Us one recent morning-after waiting in line since dawn-in hot pursuit of Power Ranger action figures.
In many areas of the country, the Power Rangers show airs when school-age children are supposed to be finishing off the Captain Crunch, pulling on the book pack and getting off to school. Instead, they stand transfixed in front of the TV screen watching the Megazord blast King Sphinx into pixie dust.
Said Ban Pryor, spokeswoman for Saban: “In West Palm Beach it aired at 7:30 a.m. The schools were irate because kids were coming in late and the parents were upset because they were having to fight to get them away from the television set and onto the school bus. There were so many complaints, they moved the show to 7 a.m.”
Like the Ninja Turtles, the Power Rangers came out of nowhere fast, but with a load of lore so complex that it might have been plotted by the team of Clinton and Rodham-Clinton.
Because adults generally can’t bear watching the TV show for longer than it takes to get the milk mustache off a 1st grader’s face, many people have been walking around malls dazed and asking questions such as, “Do you have any idea whether I’d find a Megazord in Toyland or Ace Hardware?”
So to foster understanding, peace on Earth and death to Rita Repulsa, your full-service Tempo section has prepared a Power Rangers Parental Primer.
In the beginning-a cartoon tycoon: Because the Power Rangers are a grab bag of every kid lure in the pop-culture tackle box, it comes as little surprise that their creator is an Egyptian, Jewish former rock concert promoter who once went bust trying to promote a Japanese harp orchestra touring Israel during the Yom Kippur War.
Saban, 48, made a multimillion-dollar comeback in the U.S., however, by producing TV theme songs for the likes of “Dallas,” “Starsky & Hutch” and “He-Man and the Masters of the Universe.” Not satisfied with those artistic achievements, he then got into kiddie programming and brought the world “The New Archies” as well as the “Samurai Pizza Cats.”
He is now CEO of Saban Entertainment in Burbank, and the producer of “Kidd Video”-MTV for the prepubescent-for CBS.
The creative seed for the Power Rangers sprang from some old film clips Saban came across while checking out the library of a Japanese film company, Toei Inc. The footage depicted the exploits of a ranting villainess (Rita Repulsa, Empress of Evil), her band of reptilian alien thugs (Goldar, Baboo, Squatt and Dredwing), and an array of robo-warriors.
“He loved the Godzilla-kung-fu aspect of it,” Pryor explained.
Saban next concocted a plan to wed a modern team of teenage ninja superheroes with the old Toei Inc. footage, tempering the bashing and screaming with a social message at the end of each episode. Recycling and non-violence, or non-violent recycling, are frequent themes.
Toei officials were so captivated by Saban’s idea that they decided to do the same thing in Japan, with their own teenagers, so there actually are two sets of Power Rangers on the planet. The use of the Japanese footage in the American version is why Rita Repulsa’s mouth track doesn’t fit the sound track. In these portions of the show, the English is dubbed.
When Saban went knocking with his Anglo Power Rangers pilot, he found no takers until he got to Fox Broadcasting, the L.A. Raiders of the TV world where everyone else’s rejects become all-stars.
The story line: Long ago in a distant galaxy, Zordon, Champion of Decency, defeated Rita Repulsa, the Empress of Evil, in a long-running battle for control of the universe that came down to three-out-of-five coin tosses.
After winning, Zordon banished Rita and her crew to a sealed Zithium cylinder (a space-waste dumpster) and set them adrift. A thousand years later, Rita somehow trapped Zordon, but she had a traffic accident, crashing into the Earth’s moon. Naturally, we Earthlings sent up a couple of astronauts to check out all the commotion, and the astro-dupes set Rita free, whereupon she headed for Earth, where she began raising havoc.
Zordon, however, had anticipated this and planted an interdimensional communication device and supercomputer in a secret command center in the California desert. He had also recruited a small android named Alpha Five to monitor the center and keep an eye on Rita.
To counter her amazing destructive powers, Zordon did a computer search through time and came up with “the two most powerful forces ever to exist on Earth,” namely:
– Prehistoric dinosaurs.
– Teenagers with attitudes.
Using fossil remains as models, Zordon built Dinozords-huge fighting vehicles-that come in five body styles: Tyrannosaurus, Pterodactyl, Triceratops, Sabertooth Tiger and Mastodon.
According to Saban’s zany press release, each comes fully equipped with “guidance and weapons systems, super propulsion, front and rear bucket seats, air conditioning and four-wheel, anti-lock brakes.” (“Have you driven a zord lately?”)
An extra-special feature of the Dinozords is that they can be interlocked to create one especially mighty evil-fighting robo-beast, the Megazord.
Are you still with us?
Once he had the Dinozord thing put together, Zordon had a casting call for teenagers with attitudes. It didn’t take long, of course, to fill that bill. But also required were “special physical skills and an innate ability to wear spandex.” Each teenager, upon being selected, was assigned a dinosaurian title and color, and outfitted with matching Dinozord weaponry designed “to enhance their own unique physical capabilities.”
Morphing made easy: The teenagers transform into the Power Rangers by holding up each of their Coins of Power (contained in their Power Morpher belt buckles) and chanting, in turn, “Mastodon,” “Sabertooth Tiger,” “Triceratops,” “Pterodactyl” and “Tyrannosaurus Rex.” It sounds complicated, but have you tried to change clothes in a phone booth lately?
And now, the stars of the show: Zordon located the perfect group of teenagers at fictional Angel Grove High, where he found five young people “each with a special physical skill, each with their own unique leadership abilities . . . each with a unique hairstyle.”
Jason, a k a Tyrannosaurus-Jason (Austin St. John of Roswell, N.M.) is a hunky beefcake black belt in karate. He is leader of the team and enjoys working on his karate moves and “scoping babes” at school. Vitals: His Power Ranger uniform is red, and his weapon is the Power Sword. He is the designated pilot of the Megazord.
Kimberly, a k a Pterodactyl-Kimberly (actress Amy Jo Johnson of Cape Cod, Mass.) is the designated power babe “who loves mirrors, shopping malls and gymnastics.” On top of that, however, “she is strong and independent and has always longed for adventure and danger as long as she could find a real water-proof mascara.” Vitals: Her Power Ranger color is pink, and her weapon is the Power Bow.
Trini, a k a Sabertooth Tiger-Trini (Thuy Trang, a native of Vietnam) is an exotic beauty who has “lightning hands and a peaceful soul.” She reads Eastern philosophy and is intelligent and observant. Vitals: Her Power Ranger color is yellow, and her weapon is the Power Dagger.
Zack, a k a Mastodon-Zack (Walter Jones of Detroit) is black, charming and energetic. He practices a new bicultural martial art dubbed “hip-hop-kido.” Vitals: His Power Ranger color is black, and his weapon is the Power Axe.
Billy, a k a Triceratops-Billy (actor David Yost of Council Bluffs, Iowa) is the lovable techno-nerd who belongs to “the debate team, the science club, math club, chess club, Mensa and the William F. Buckley Vocabulary Society.” Vitals: His Power Ranger color is blue, and his weapon is the Power Lance.
Hot breaking news to impress your little Power Rangers at home: Tommy the green Power Ranger will be back, and with his own show!
Some background: Tommy, played by handsome, long-haired Jason Frank, first appeared in the seventh episode, and the response to him was “unbelievable,” Pryor said.
But just an episode or so later, Tommy was robbed of his powers by the evil Rita, and little has been heard from Tommy since.
“He generated so much fan mail that Haim decided to give him his own show,” Pryor said. “They are going to call it `Sybertron.’ It will be out some time next year.”
No doubt it will inspire yet another line of action figures not to be found in stores anywhere near you next holiday season.
