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Our three dinner parties were spurred by personal motivations and public events.

Daniel and Daniele Roberts gather together friends to attend and shop at the annual American Institute of Wine & Food’s Best of the Midwest Market fundraiser at Ravinia Park in Highland Park-benefiting the Institute and Ravinia-then rush back to the Robertses’ city home to cook what they’ve purchased.

Tony and JoJo Terlato, owners of Paterno Imports Ltd., an importer and marketer of premium wines, have hosted an annual farewell-to-summer wine tasting and dinner on the Sunday before Labor Day for the last five years. The event is held in their Lake Forest back yard with food prepared and served by a different chef each year.

“We like to eat out, but we also like to entertain at home; it’s more personal,” says Tony Terlato, chairman of the 49-year-old company.

Glenview neighbors Sally Stern and Joan Goldin simply love to cook. They first met 18 years ago when Stern heard that a gas line was being installed in a new neighbor’s home.

“This was someone I had to meet. It meant that she really liked to cook,” says Stern, whose interest in cooking stemmed from staying home with young children and watching Fran ois and Antoinette Pope’s cooking show on television. Goldin’s involvement resulted from contact with her physician husband’s colleagues from many countries who exposed them to new cuisines.

Meal-planning and cooking procedures have become more important as we’ve been deluged in recent years with cooking shows and classes, cookbooks and magazines, specialty food shops and football-field-size grocery stores packed with ingredients from around the globe.

Stern and Goldin pore over hundreds of recipes to develop a special progressive dinner, which will start at one of their homes and end at the other, two doors away. Their first collaborative effort was to host a dinner for travelmates, including Rick Bayless, owner of Frontera Grill, after a trip to Oaxaca, Mexico.

Whether for that meal or any other, Stern and Goldin shop at several stores to buy the freshest and finest items-to Carrot Top in Northfield for vegetables, to Fresh Fields in Evanston for fish and to Harrison’s Poultry in Glenview for duck. They also often trek to the city’s ethnic emporiums. And they take additional measures, making their own bread and pastry and growing many of the herbs and flowers used in cooking and decorating dishes, napkins and candle centerpieces.

They test recipes until the 11th hour. For their progressive dinner, they tried and eliminated veal chops because a chop didn’t look “nice on a plate,” Stern says. So they switched to boneless duck breasts in a dark mahogany glazed stock flavored with onions, carrots, garlic and herbs.

But sometimes, even after menu alterations, they’re not satisfied.

Though Stern liked the flavor of her roasted tomato soup, an original, she was disappointed that the recipe hadn’t made more. Goldin decided to serve three versions of several recipes because she couldn’t decide which of the roasted pecans, wild rice-orzo timbales, braised onions or slender haricots verts were best.

“She can’t stop,” muses Stern, who tends to be more definite about her choices. Explains Goldin, “I’m a painter and need to experiment.”

The cast, date and timing of the big-deal party have been broadened beyond the once-traditional formula of happily married couples arriving in business attire at 7 p.m. on a weekend. Today’s social event is as likely to star an odd number of guests, many single, who arrive dressed casually though stylishly on any night of the week-and sometimes in the afternoon.

For Daniel and Daniele Roberts’ annual Sunday night cookathon to celebrate the Best of the Midwest Market, which brings together 80 food purveyors from the Midwest, guests know to wear jeans, comfortable shoes and aprons. After shopping the market for the freshest fruits, vegetables, salad greens and specialty items, they return to the Robertses’ home, where each gets an assignment.

At the Robertses’ recent dinner, the cast included Gary Hopmayer, founder of Original American Scones, who was in charge of grilling portabello mushrooms. Larry King, an architect, helped Daniele fine-tune the menu; he also prepared the risotto and helped with the leek, potato and corn soup. Susan Silverman, a former neighbor who is a residential property manager, also helped with the soup, cooking tiny “pea” potatoes. She also supervised cleaning up. “I’m part of the clean-as-you-go school,” she says proudly.

Daniel Roberts set the table, chose the wines-which included a Bordeaux from his wife’s family’s winery in France-made the celery rmoulade and grilled the chicken sausages. Daniele cooked beet greens to garnish the sausage course. Most important, she functioned as the major-domo, exhorting everyone to “get back to work,” whenever participants began to neglect their tasks, instead chatting and nibbling on Fantome Farm’s fresh chvre.

Invitations today often are extended by phone, by voice mail, e-mail or fax instead of via the old-fashioned printed invitation. They were for the Roberts and Stern-Goldin parties. The Terlatos still prefer a printed invitation for their annual party.

Part of the reason, says Tony Terlato, is the size of the group: 60. It also fits with the more formal nature of the food, though the attire is casual-dresses and sport jackets.

Their dinner this year was prepared by rising star Sanford D’Amato of Sanford’s restaurant in Milwaukee.

His multi-course dinner included hors d’oeuvres, a crab ceviche with lobster wine gel, coriander-crusted swordfish, pomegranate molasses-glazed squab and foie gras with figs, a cheese course and a warm chocolate tart with coffee ice cream. A stellar group of eight wines was available during a pre-dinner stand-up tasting.

The meal at a ’90s party rarely features a traditional format, with an hour for cocktails and hors d’oeuvres in the living room, followed by a seated dinner.

The Terlatos started with wine on the lawn of their sweeping property at 5 p.m., then moved their guests to seated tables by the pool. Each table was decorated to suggest a Monet water lily painting in honor of the Art Institute’s exhibit. Strolling violinists serenaded.

The Stern-Goldin party began traditionally, but guests freely wandered in and out of the kitchens to inspect and taste works in progress. The evening ended in Goldin’s kitchen, with guests enjoying final sips of wine and bites of apple tart with thick dollops of crme frache.

All three meals reflected the hosts’ preferences, rather than taking into account every guest’s food idiosyncracies.

“A few years back, you’d get people announcing in advance that they just ‘couldn’t eat this,’ ” says Barbara Kafka, New York cookbook author and Gourmet Magazine columnist. “Now, when people plan a menu, they think about how enjoyable rather than how healthful the meal will be and what they want to eat.”

At the Stern-Goldin dinner (the recipes from which follow this article), the women disregarded the request of Goldin’s husband, a cardiovascular surgeon at Rush-Presbyterian-St. Luke’s Medical Center, to hold the butter and cholesterol.

“When you put in this much effort, you should cook what you enjoy,” says Stern.

Both sexes are comfortable planning and executing contemporary social evenings.

Terlato takes great pride. “We entertain a lot, sometimes two to three times a month-chefs, journalists, social friends and family. I’m already planning next year’s party.”

Although they were guests at their wives’ dinner, Jerry Stern and Marshall Goldin played vital roles. Stern, a retired ad executive, took photographs for the couple’s albums, helped choose the wine and enjoyed his status as critic. “I critique rather than criticize,” he says.

Dr. Goldin offered to bake the bread in his back-yard oven, though he was politely rebuffed for this evening by his wife.

The best change that was reflected in these big-deal dinners was that another generation is eager to keep the ovens warm and the food processors whirring. Two of the Goldins’ three sons stopped by to chat, eat leftovers and talk animatedly of their love for cooking and eating, inspired by their parents.

The Terlatos’ two sons, both in the family business and guests at the party, are proudly described by their father as “good amateur chefs. One can make a good sauce and the other a good risotto.”

The following recipes were part of the menu at the Stern-Goldin dinner party.

OVEN-ROASTED WALNUTS WITH ROSEMARY

About five cups

1 egg

1 egg white

5 cups walnut halves

3 tablespoons dried rosemary

2 teaspoons coarse (kosher) salt

1/2 teaspoon freshly ground pepper

3 tablespoons olive oil

2 tablespoons unsalted butter, softened

1. Heat oven to 350 degrees. Beat egg and egg white in a large bowl until frothy. Add walnuts and gently toss until coated. Lightly oil a heavyweight baking sheet and spread the walnuts evenly on it. Bake for 15 minutes.

2. Remove nuts from oven and add rosemary, salt, pepper, olive oil and butter. Combine with a spatula until ingredients are evenly distributed. Reduce oven temperature to 250 degrees. Return nuts to oven and bake, turning often, until nuts are slightly crunchy, about 25 to 30 minutes. Adjust seasoning.

ROASTED TOMATO SOUP

Eight servings

6 cloves garlic, finely chopped

1/2 cup fresh basil leaves, chopped

1/3 cup olive oil

4 pounds ripe plum tomatoes, halved

2 large sweet onions, such as Vidalia, each cut into 6 wedges

1 teaspoon salt or to taste

1/2 teaspoon freshly ground pepper

1 1/2 cups diced stale bread

3 cups unsalted chicken stock or broth

1/8 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes

Homemade croutons, for garnish

1. Heat oven to 375 degrees. Line with foil a baking sheet with sides or a jellyroll pan.

2. Combine garlic and basil with olive oil in a small bowl. Place tomato halves and onion wedges on prepared pan. Rub oil mixture into tomato halves and onion wedges. Arrange tomatoes and onions cut side up and sprinkle with some of the salt and pepper. Bake until lightly browned, about 1 hour.

3. Transfer tomatoes and onions and pan juices to a large saucepan. Add bread cubes, chicken stock and red pepper flakes. Simmer for 15 minutes. Pure in batches in food processor or in a loosely covered blender.

4. To serve, reheat soup in saucepan. Taste and adjust seasoning with remaining salt and pepper. Serve garnished with croutons.

SEAFOOD IN PAPILLOTE

Eight servings

2 teaspoons each: fresh lemon juice, fresh orange juice, licorice-flavored liqueur (such as Pernod)

1/4 cup crme frache

1/2 cup clarified butter (see note)

48 bay scallops, about 2/3 pound

48 peeled, deveined rock shrimp, about 1/2 pound

2 medium carrots, finely julienned

1 large leek, white part only, finely julienned

Finely grated rind of 1/2 lemon

Finely grated rind of 1/2 orange

1 teaspoon salt

Freshly ground pepper

8 sprigs of fresh thyme or tarragon

1. Heat oven to 475 degrees. Cut 8 rectangular pieces of parchment paper measuring 13-by-10 inches. Fold parchment in half and cut into a heart shape. Have 2 baking sheets ready.

2. Mix lemon juice, orange juice, liqueur and crme frache in small bowl.

3. Using a pastry brush, brush some of the clarified butter onto one half of the parchment heart. Place 6 scallops and 6 shrimp on the buttered side of one parchment heart. Place 1Z8 of the carrots, leeks, lemon and orange rind on top of the seafood. Season with salt and pepper. Repeat to make all 8.

4. Divide crme frache mixture evenly among the papillotes. Drizzle evenly with remaining butter and top each with a sprig of fresh thyme or tarragon. Put the opposite side of the parchment paper over the filled side. Starting at the top, fold the bottom parchment over the top to seal, one-half inch at a time. Transfer to baking sheets in a single layer.

5. Bake until parchment puffs up and turns lightly brown, about 6 minutes. Serve immediately.

Note: To make clarified butter, melt butter in a small saucepan or in the microwave. Skim off any foam. Decant only the clear yellow liquid butter into a small dish; discard the milky solids.

DUCK BREASTS WITH PORT WINE SAUCE

Eight servings

8 boneless duck breast halves

1/4 cup olive oil

1 tablespoon each, chopped fresh: sage and thyme

1 teaspoon salt

Freshly ground pepper to taste

1 cup port wine

1 cup reduced duck stock (see note)

1 tablespoon dried green peppercorns

1 teaspoon chopped fresh sage

2 tablespoons butter

1. Score fatty side of duck breasts in a crosshatch pattern. Mix oil and 1 tablespoon each sage and thyme in a small bowl. Rub into the breasts. Place in a container, cover and refrigerate overnight.

2. Remove breasts from refrigerator and pat dry. Season fatty side with salt and pepper. Heat a skillet over high heat until hot; add 2 duck breasts, fat side down. Cook until nicely browned, about 4 minutes. Drain off fat as it accumulates. Turn breasts over and continue cooking for 1 minute. Remove duck to a baking sheet and continue cooking remaining breasts. Set browned breasts aside while making sauce.

3. Heat oven to 500 degrees.

4. Drain fat from pan juices. Pour port wine into pan juices in pan; heat to a boil while scraping up browned bits from bottom of pan; boil until reduced by about half. Add duck stock, peppercorns and remaining 1 teaspoon sage. Boil until reduced and until slightly thickened. Strain into a small saucepan.

5. Shortly before serving, place browned duck breasts in the oven. Roast until medium-rare, about 5 minutes. Remove from oven, cover loosely with foil and allow them to rest for 10 minutes.

6. To serve, carve duck breasts on a diagonal against the grain. Reheat sauce, whisk in butter until smooth (do not boil sauce) and serve alongside duck breasts.

Note: Duck sauce makes a great-tasting sauce. You can make your own stock from duck bones following a recipe for chicken stock. Let the stock boil until reduced and rich tasting. Duck stock is available frozen at some specialty meat markets such as Gepperth’s, 1964 N. Halsted St. You may substitute low-sodium chicken broth that has been reduced by half but the final sauce will not have quite the same body.

APPLE TARTS

Eight servings

Adapted from Lionel Poilane’s recipe in “Bistro Cooking,” by Patricia Wells

For pastry dough:

2 cups all-purpose flour

1/2 teaspoon baking powder

3/4 teaspoon salt

1 tablespoon granulated sugar

1 3/4 cups (31/2 sticks) chilled unsalted butter

6 tablespoons cold milk

For filling and assembly:

8 Granny Smith apples

1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter

1/2 cup granulated sugar

1 egg, lightly beaten

1/2 cup packed light brown sugar

1/2 cup crme frache, optional

1. For pastry dough, sift flour, baking powder, salt and sugar into a large bowl. Add the 1 3/4 cups of butter and cut into the mixture with a pastry cutter until mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Sprinkle milk over the dough and mix with a fork until all ingredients form a ball. Divide into eight equal pieces, flatten slightly, wrap in plastic wrap, and refrigerate for 4 hours or overnight.

2. For filling, peel and core apples. Cut each apple into 12 even slices. Melt butter in large skillet over medium-high heat. When butter is hot, add apples, sprinkle with granulated sugar and saut until tender. Refrigerate until cool.

3. Heat oven to 350 degrees. Line 2 baking sheets with parchment paper.

4. Remove one piece of dough from the refrigerator and roll into a 7-inch circle. Cut it into a 6-inch circle using a 6-inch plate as a guide. Arrange 1Z8 of the apple wedges in a circle over the pastry. Fold edges of dough over apples to form a 1-inch border and brush border with beaten egg.

5. Place tarts on prepared baking sheet. Repeat to make 8 tarts.

6. Bake tarts until golden brown, about 20 minutes. Remove from oven and sprinkle apples with brown sugar. Serve warm with crme frache.