Cruising is a no-brainer.
At least, that’s the way a lot of people think about cruising: no important decisions to make, do as much or as little as you want, no worry about where to have dinner tonight. Simple.
It is true that the relative simplicity of a cruise vacation is a big draw for many cruisers. After all, what could be easier? You check in your bags at the airport, they appear magically in your stateroom, you unpack once, and then get to visit three or four (or more) ports of call completely hassle-free.
But, to paraphrase an adage, there can be many a slip ‘twixt the home and the ship–especially for the first-time cruise passenger. And while the cruise itself may free you from making weighty decisions, the decisions you make before the cruise can be crucial to your enjoyment of the experience. Among the most important are your choices of:
– Cruise line and ship.
– Cruise itinerary.
– Travel agency.
– Category and location of your stateroom.
– Mealtimes and table size.
Once you’ve decided to try cruising, the absolutely, positively first thing you should do is get your hands on a good cruising guidebook. I can, without reservation, recommend two: “Fodor’s Cruises and Ports of Call, 1996” (Fodor’s Travel Publications, $18.50) and “Fielding’s Guide to Worldwide Cruises, 1996” (Fielding Worldwide Inc., $18.95).
These two guides will give you detailed descriptions and information–including subjective evaluations–on the cruise lines, the individual ships, the itineraries sailed, and the ports of call. Pick one or the other of the guides, and begin your cruise-planning process, starting with . . .
Cruise line and ship selection. Cruise lines and their ships have distinct personalities. Some lines–Carnival leaps to mind–project a boogie-till-dawn, party-hearty image, and their modern megaships deliver that atmosphere. Other lines cater to an older, wealthier clientele with smallish ships, exotic ports of call, and lavish accommodations and service–all at a price, of course. Then, there are the mainstream cruise lines whose ships try to attract a mix of passengers.
Choosing the right line and the right ship is important. I was recently on a cruise with about 1,100 other passengers, at least 85 percent of whom were of retirement age–or well beyond it. And while I’m not thirtysomething, I’m not sixtysomething either. (The cruise was a 10-day affair, and an immutable axiom of cruising explains the age of the passengers: The longer the cruise, the older the passengers.)
So use the information in the guidebooks to narrow down your choice of line and ship.
Itinerary selection. One determinant of selecting your cruise ship may be its itinerary. Many cruise lines sail roughly the same routes with roughly the same ports of call, so if those routes appeal to you, you can use the factors noted above to make your ship selection.
But if you want to visit more exotic, out-of-the-way ports, you’ll have to go with the line or lines that sail there. As a first-timer, however, it may be best to try one of the mainstream itineraries that affords you the greatest choice of cruise lines and ships. Your fellow passengers will volunteer reams of information about other lines, ships, itineraries and their cruising experience.
Port stops are generally incredibly brief, some as short as four hours. So don’t expect to cozy up to Cozumel or get intimate with Guadeloupe–you simply won’t have time.
Agency selection. Selecting a travel agency through which to book your cruise is almost as important as selecting your cruise line and itinerary. Many travel agencies have little or no real cruise experience. Others, called cruise-only agencies, sell only cruises and are very knowledgeable about the cruise lines, their ships and, often, the ports of call.
Another specialized category of agency is the cruise discounter. Check them out. They’re legitimate, and you’ll find listings of them in the cruise guides.
Stateroom selection. A politically correct description of virtually all standard cruise-ship staterooms would be “spatially challenged.” Most of them are pretty tight quarters–efficiently planned and engineered, but tiny. So if you can’t live with a slightly cramped feeling, and you have the extra bucks, book a suite.
As in land-based real estate, property values aboard ship depend on three things: location, location and location. Once you’ve selected your ship and its itinerary, get a brochure from the cruise line and pore over the extensive deck plans you’ll find there. There are often a dozen or more categories of staterooms to choose from, starting with inside staterooms (no window or porthole) on the lowest deck (the cheapest rooms) and moving up (literally and in price) to balconied suites on the uppermost deck.
An important thing to remember here is that moving up several categories in price doesn’t get you a bigger room. On today’s megaships, virtually all rooms (except suites) are the same size, no matter what deck they’re on or what you pay for them.
The deck plan will also help you select the right location by showing you where the discos, nightclubs and main showroom are. Unless you like going to sleep to the beat of a booming bass, don’t select a room near or above any of these entertainment centers.
Typically, you won’t select a specific stateroom when you book your cruise (although you can make the request). Instead you’ll choose a category, and the cruise line will assign you a room. As soon as you receive the assignment, check the deck plan and, if the location isn’t to your liking, request a change through your agency.
Dining choices. Although things are rapidly changing in the cruise industry, most ships still offer two seatings for meals, an early (or main) seating and a late seating. If you like breakfast at 8, lunch at noon, and dinner at 5:30, choose the early seating. But if you like to sleep in in the morning and tarry over one more mai tai in the evening, the late seating is for you.
You may select your seating time when you book your cruise, and, at the same time, you may choose how many fellow passengers you’d like to dine with. There is usually only a limited number of tables for two. The standard other choices are tables for four, six, eight and 10. Dining with other passengers is a great way to make friends, learn about other cruises (I guarantee you: Half your table will have cruised before.) and pick up information about the next port of call (I guarantee you: Someone at your table will have been there.).
On an increasing number of ships today, you can skip the dining room scene entirely, choosing instead to dine at poolside buffets at breakfast and lunch, grab a pizza or burger at dinnertime, and then graze the ubiquitous midnight buffet.
Choosing what and where and when to eat may be among the toughest decisions you’ll have to make on a cruise (along with which land tour to buy at the next port of call). But as I said:
Cruising is a no-brainer.
