We were looking for a family vacation this past winter and thought we had found the perfect place: a Vermont ski resort that assured us by telephone that baby-sitting and special children’s programs were available. I envisioned our children out on sleds or doing crafts projects, while my husband and I sipped hot toddies by the fire. We eagerly booked the reservation.
As soon as we arrived at the resort, I placed a call for a sitter. But the person at the front desk responded vaguely, saying she could probably find someone from town. Unwilling to leave a 10-year-old and a 5-year-old with a person who appeared to be a stranger to everyone, I asked about those “children’s programs.” Most had been canceled, she said, because the minimum number of children had failed to sign up in advance.
So much for the hot toddies.
It was an expensive lesson: If you want a family vacation that includes a quiet time for parents, you’ll have to ask some hard and specific questions before the fun begins.
“Parents need to be aware that many resorts feel forced to say they offer a kids program in order to stay competitive,” said Frank Oliveto, the executive director of the Resort and Commercial Recreation Association, which is based in New Port Richey, Fla., and is made up of a group of resort owners.
“You’ve got properties out there who hire a teenager from town to baby-sit in the evenings, and they’re calling it a kids program. Parents really need to ask in advance what the program consists of.”
There are other considerations, too. Child-care laws vary from state to state, and many states have none covering hotel child care, because it is a temporary arrangement. And if children are not prepared for the experience, they will balk no matter what it is.
Expect to pay $20 to $60 a day for a child-care or camp program, and $6 to $12 an hour for a hotel baby-sitter, said Dorothy Jordan, the owner of Travel With Your Children in New York, which provides information for family travel to its members.
Jordan publishes the Family Travel Times, a quarterly newsletter. (For information, 212-477-5524, or 40 Fifth Ave., New York 10011. A subscription is $40 annually.)
Jordan recommends that parents negotiate a 50 percent discount on the rate for a second child or ask to enroll a third child free. “Usually, the hotel will allow it,” she said.
As we discovered, it’s important to book reservations for children’s activities well in advance. It’s also wise to get the specifics of the program in writing, Oliveto advised. “You want to know exactly what’s happening each day. If they can’t tell you, it probably means the program isn’t very good.”
He added that the more vague the brochure regarding the child-care program, the more likely you are to be disappointed. He also cautioned to watch for words like “programs may include” or “possible offering.”
But what if, despite the assurances, the child-care program isn’t what you expected? “There isn’t any recourse from a federal, state or local standpoint that I’m aware of,” Oliveto said. Instead, he recommends complaining to the general manager and asking to be compensated with free or reduced lodging or meal costs.
“General managers have a great deal of leeway when it comes to what they can do for disgruntled customers,” he continued.
What is also important to know is that children as young as 18 months may benefit from prepping to get them comfortable with the idea of being on their own in a strange place, said Barbara Willer, the public affairs director for the National Association for the Education of Young Children, a child-care association in Washington.
“Show them brochures, build excitement for the program beforehand,” she added.
Parents are advised to ask resorts and hotels the following:
– Do they conduct background checks on the child-care staff? When hiring a baby-sitter, Jordan recommends asking whether they are bonded, which requires having a background check, and insured. The resort association also recommends that child-care workers be at least 18 if they are supervised in a program, or 21 if unsupervised.
– Is the sitter trained to handle an emergency? “The sitter needs to know how to evacuate the building and how to call for emergency help, since you often can’t dial 911 from inside a hotel room,” Oliveto said.
Insist on a sitter who has taken the American Red Cross Child Care Course. The sitter should also have a Red Cross infant and child CPR certificate, and if children will be swimming, a Red Cross lifeguard training certificate.
– What is the ratio of children to care-givers? The National Association for the Education of Young Children recommends no more than eight infants or 20 preschoolers or 26 school-age children for every two adults. Because resort programs often include swimming or sports, and children are in unfamiliar surroundings, Willer recommends lower ratios.
– Are children in a secure area? Adults should have to show identification before they can pick them up.
– Are children divided into age groups? “Make sure your 10-year-old isn’t lumped with the 3-year-olds,” Jordan said.
– Is the program flexible? “Find out if deciding to sleep late means your child will miss out on the day’s activities, or whether you can pull her out for a little family excursion,” Jordan said.
For some children, the program will be just like another day in day care. Others might be reluctant to join in on even the best programs, a frustrating turn for parents.
“We chose a Club Med precisely because it could accommodate our twins, who were 18 months old at the time,” recalled Tamara Eberlein of Ridgefield, Conn. “But my son Jamie, who was just heading into the separation anxiety phase, refused to stay. We came back after two hours away only to be told he’d screamed the whole time.”
Some children aren’t so much reluctant as overwhelmed by the number of activities at hand. “It sometimes helps to pick an activity for your child,” Jordan said. She also recommends that a sitter arrive early to spend a little time with the entire family.
But children may be unhappy because they spend too much vacation time in child care. “You have to remember that this is their vacation, too,” Willer said. “Ideally, they should spend some time with you.”
