During a White Sox-Texas game July 27 at Comiskey Park, a security guard working the left-field bleachers spotted a fan flagrantly ignoring the rules of the park.
He quickly swooped down the aisles and pounced on the perpetrator, carrying away two plastic bottles of mineral water and an empty Pringles can. The security guard was booed roundly as he walked away. Then he smiled and held the contraband aloft in a triumphant pose. One Sox fan, who had seen enough, stood up and shouted: “Don’t you know you’re chasing away the only fans you have left?”
The answer, obviously, is a resounding no. Likewise, White Sox management is in deep denial that many fans are boycotting Comiskey Park because they either don’t like the ballpark or don’t like the way they’re treated once they’re inside it.
In April, Sox Chairman Jerry Reinsdorf defended the ballpark. “The park was filled from 1991 through 1994,” he said. “It’s much better than old Comiskey Park, where concrete fell.”
But apparently, Sox fans don’t feel the same way. The curiosity factor is over and the majority of fans seem to agree that the old ballpark was better, despite falling concrete, too many poles and all the other negatives Reinsdorf exploited to get his new park built.
In 1990, the final year of old Comiskey, the Sox drew 31 crowds of 30,000 or more in paid attendance. This year, they have had five crowds of 30,000 or more heading into the weekend. Those five include Opening Day and three Cleveland games in late June in which attendance was inflated by thousands of Indians fans.
Because it would be too expensive and time-consuming to blow up new Comiskey and start over, here are 10 friendly suggestions on how to make the new park as lovable as the old one:
1.: Fill in the moat behind the outfield fence with more bleacher seats and lower the outfield wall. Although this would require moving the bullpens, so be it. Fans would be closer to the action and a shorter fence could mean more Ken Berry-type, over-the-wall catches. There was no real reason for the construction of the moat in the first place, unless it was to save money on the home runs that clear the fence but don’t make it into the stands. Home runs should wind up in the hands of fans instead of bullpen catchers. Period.
2.: Cover half of the upper deck and take out the seats in far left field and far right field. Everyone hates these seats. Junk ’em. Add a full roof over the rest of the upper deck (yes, this will take poles) and bolt TVs to the poles so people with the most distant seats can see what’s going on and catch replays. It works just fine at Wrigley Field.
3.: Dump the rotating advertising sign behind home plate. The increasingly generic backgrounds of ballparks, as exposed by center-field TV cameras, are an aesthetic concern to which profit-oriented owners don’t want to admit. Tacky is a nice way of putting it. Greedy is another. How many times have you watched a pitcher go into his windup just to lose the flight of the ball as it blends in with the advertising sign? This is not the NBA.
4.: Stop Nancy Faust (before it’s too late). The players take a few days off once in a while. Take a breather, Nancy. Is it possible for Faust to go two consecutive pitches without that incessant organ music? One Sox veteran claims the worst thing about playing at home is having to listen to the same songs and ditties over and over and over again. Mute button, please.
5.: Can the Fan-O-Meter. Sure, other towns use this ludicrous device, which implores fans to provide “Noise, Noise, Noise” or get “Louder, Louder, Louder.” This is Chicago. Don’t insult your real fans with that silly marketing trick. Stop. Stop. Stop. Is that loud enough for you?
6.: Less taped music. After a particularly tough loss to the Oakland A’s last month, Pink Floyd’s “Us and Them” was played over the public-address system. Good song, but is it possible no one wants to hear the best of the ’70s at, or even after, a ballgame? Owners apparently believe all fans have a pinball mentality and can’t function without music filling their ears at all times. If we want to hear Pink Floyd, we’ll turn on our own stereos in the privacy of our own houses or cars. Besides, what makes them think fans want album-oriented rock rather than classical music, jazz, rap or blues?
7.: Ribbie and Roobarb Demolition Night. We never did get to give those two furry scamps a proper sendoff. Steve Dahl can even be the master of ceremonies.
8.: Allow tailgating outside the ballpark and coolers inside. Tailgating works OK at Bears games and Milwaukee Brewers games. Why wouldn’t it work at Sox games? As for coolers, the Ballpark of Arlington allows fans to bring in plastic coolers with sandwiches, snacks and water or soft drinks in plastic containers. The Rangers have their priorities right: Get the fans into the park first. Then try to get them to buy concession products for inflated prices. If they can’t afford to buy food or drinks, at least they have bought the tickets. What the Rangers may lose in concession sales they gain in creating a more fan-friendly environment. That encourages return trips to the park. Makes too much sense, doesn’t it?
9.: Bring back the shower. If you’re going to steal from the master, go all the way. Bill Veeck’s outfield shower is a timeless idea and it would work as well in the 1990s as it did in the ’70s.
10.: Reduce ticket prices. Now. The less fans pay for tickets, the more they’ll spend on food, pop and beer. The less they pay for tickets, the more times they’ll come back in the future. The less they pay for tickets, the less they will grouse about traffic jams and parking lot nightmares that are a staple of night games at Comiskey.
Trust us.
WHAT ARE YOUR SUGGESTIONS? . . .
Weigh in with your ideas on what the White Sox should do to put fans in the stands at Comiskey Park. Or if there’s something else on your mind, please drop us a line.
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