Dick Dietrick, host of “Night Stand,” the fictional comedy show that parodies talk shows, is ripping the lid off another emerging crisis in America: Eurotrash, which Dietrick says is “an interesting, interesting story that seems to be happening across America.”
“These Eurotrash, as they don’t like to be called–they don’t mind Euroscum, but they’re a little upset with Eurotrash–they seem to invade towns,” the Dietrick character says. “And the mom-and-pop hardware stores and shoe stores are being driven out by these cappuccino-drinking, cigarette-smoking, black-socks-and-sandal-wearing people.”
One of the show’s “guests” is an angry woman from Oregon whose father nearly killed himself because his little establishment was lost because of competition from a rival store owned by “greedy, evil foreigners.”
“Apparently, he locked himself in the car in a garage,” Dietrick said during the spoof. “Had he turned on the engine, he would have died.”
During another episode, a fictitious Swiss fashion designer was talking up “Euromall,” a development said to have figured in closing the man’s store, when an incensed audience member, identified as the owner of a sushi bar, rushed the stage.
“We have people fight all the time onstage. And secretly we encourage that,” Dietrick said, “as long as there’s no blood that we have to clean up later.”
As regular viewers know, “Night Stand With Dick Dietrick” is really a lampoon of the wacky world of issue-oriented talk shows, with Tim Stack playing dim host Dietrick. The show on “Eurotrash” is special because the guy who goes after the Swiss designer is played by WRCX-FM morning host Mancow Muller.
“It’s pretty funny. I had a blast,” said Muller about the episode, which is on the E! entertainment cable network at 9:30 p.m. Tuesday, with its syndicated broadcast coming Saturday night at 12:30 a.m. on WGN-Ch. 9.
Muller, who has a theater degree from Central Missouri State University, was one of several disc jockeys around the country who participated in a contest, with the winners getting a guest appearance on the show. Stack said the jocks had to submit “Dick-isms,” or silly topics that could be the focal point of an episode.
“He really did his homework,” said Stack, 41, of Muller’s submissions. “He really had some good ones.”
Muller, 29, said he sent roughly 50 story ideas, including:
“Straight Men Who Are Afraid to Admit They’re Not Gay,” “Clowns Who Hate Kids,” “Felons in Diapers: What Happens When Babies Break the Law,” “Theme Park Mascots That Feel Empty Inside,” “People Who Don’t Care About Madonna’s Baby,” “Talk Show Hosts Who Only Pretend to Care.”
“I mean, stuff flows out of me after being on `(Jerry) Springer’ 50 times,” said Muller. “I’ve got a grasp on trash TV.” Muller last week was supposed to tape Leeza Gibbons’ daytime talker for a segment on outrageous radio stunts.
Stack said that having deejays appearing on the show could have backfired, because “the thing with our show is, if people try to be funny, the joke’s over. And (Muller) was great. He played it really straight.”
Stack said there is a good chance Muller’s “angry American” character could make a return visit. The same could be said for “Night Stand,” with Stack noting the show has been renewed for another year by the stations on which it is syndicated. Whether E!, which runs “Night Stand” Monday through Thursday, will continue to co-produce the show remains to be seen.
Meanwhile, Muller said even though he is having a blast with his radio show in Chicago, he “absolutely” has a future in television.
“I’ve got something coming up right now,” he said, although he didn’t want to go into specifics, except to say it probably will be a sitcom. “Networks want to do a Mancow show. I’ve submitted some ideas. And certainly a cable special, some other things, are in the works.
“I think the reason I play on the TV is because you can tell I’m a genuine guy. And I’m not ugly like (Howard) Stern.”
Muller’s radio show will be syndicated to some major cities soon, with his hometown of Kansas City, Mo., beaming him in in February.
– Where’s the remote: ABC’s “Home Improvement” offers a special episode at 8 p.m. Tuesday on WLS-Ch. 7. It’s set totally within Tim Taylor’s (Tim Allen) “Tool Time” cable TV home improvement show, as Tim and his crew try to please Swedish businessmen interested in distributing the show in their country (“Home Improvement” once devoted an hour to “Tool Time” sketches that have appeared on the show over the years.) Drew Carey makes a special appearance, returning a favor Allen once did for Carey’s show.
– Here’s a twist: Jodie Foster plays the voice of a talking tattoo egging on a man to murder on Fox’s “The X-Files” (8 p.m. Sunday, WFLD-Ch. 32). The twist? In the pilot for “The X-Files,” Dana Scully (Gillian Anderson) seemed suspiciously like the character Clarice Starling, the fictional FBI trainee Foster won a best actress Academy Award for portraying in “Silence of the Lambs.”
