“Boomers don’t simply want to be grandparents; Boomers want to be the perfect grandparents.”
— J. Walker Smith, Yankelovich Partners Inc.
LEAVE IT TO THE BOOMERS to set the bar a little higher when it comes to the art of grandparenting. After all, it has never been their style to settle for mediocrity. No matter what life stage they’re at, they’ve been determined to do things bigger and better than any generation that has come before. They’ve certainly got bigger covered; the jury’s still out on better.
Just as they kept the parenting book publishers in business a generation ago, they are now hungry for books that will give them the inside scoop on being the perfect grandparent. Once again, what the Boomers want, the Boomers get. The bookstore shelves are already starting to buckle under the weight of books about grandparenting. Not surprisingly, many of the titles reflect a decidedly Boomer mindset: “How to Be a Way Cool Grandfather,” “Grandparenting: It’s Not What It Used to Be,” “Expert Answers to the Questions Grandparents Ask Most” and “The Nanas and The Papas: A Boomers’ Guide to Grandparenting.”
Bruce Clark, vice president of Age Wave IMPACT Inc., a marketing firm that specializes in the 50-plus market, isn’t surprised to see the boom in books on grandparenting, noting that it has always been the Boomers’ style to research things to death, and that they’re simply preparing themselves for the next chapter in their lives. “The Boomers are ready to indulge themselves in the experience of grandparenthood.”
Indulgence? Experience? That certainly does sound awfully Boomer-like, doesn’t it? The mere act of becoming a grandparent isn’t likely to convince the Joe Average Boomer to abandon his characteristic navel-gazing ways, Smith says. “The needs and interests of the grandkids will, in many cases, be subordinate to the needs and interests of the Boomer grandparents.”
Norman Sherman, managing director of The Seniors Network Inc., a marketing company that focuses on the seniors’ market, agrees that the Boomers will be keeping their own wants and needs at the forefront.
“The Boomers will take a similar approach to grandparenting as they did to parenting. They will engage in a lot of introspection about what they’ve done right and wrong. There will, however, be a real desire to do a better job as grandparents than they did as parents.”
They will be a more youthful generation of grandparents, not necessarily in chronological age but certainly in mindset.
“Boomers will be `youthful’ grandparents,” Smith said. “The enduring core element of the Boomer psyche is youthfulness: vigor, energy, a sense of adventure, idealism and rule-breaking.”
Clarice Carlson Orr, author of “The Joy of Grandparenting” (Dageforde Publishing, $10), agrees.
“Boomer grandparents are healthier, stronger and more active than grandparents of previous generations. They have learned about the dangers of smoking and alcohol and the benefits of healthy eating and exercise. Better medical care is helping them live longer and better.
“Grandparents today can take their families snowskiing, waterskiing, canoeing, biking, hiking, snorkeling, rafting and mountain climbing. I have a friend in her 70s who in-line skates with her grandkids, and another, at 74, who still rides horses with her granddaughter.”
That Boomer love of adventure and unfaltering wanderlust will spawn a boom in intergenerational travel, Smith predicts.
“Boomers like adventure, which extends to travel. This is something Boomers will want to do, so if the grandkids want time with their grandparents, they’ll have to go along.”
Sherman has already seen evidence of this trend emerging in recent years. He points to the popularity of the Disney Institute, an offshoot of the Disney entertainment empire. The institute offers “learning vacations” that are designed to appeal to the Boomers; they can get away from it all and hone their gourmet cooking skills or master the art of animation at the same time. He notes that the Disney Institute is organized in such a way that grandparents can bring their grandchildren along.
While Grandma is busy learning the art of Mediterranean cooking from one of the most respected chefs in the country, little Mia or Thorne can take acting lessons from an entertainment industry giant at Camp Disney. Obviously, the marketing gurus at Disney are ready to tap into the growing interest in intergenerational travel. It’s only a matter of time before the rest of the travel industry catches on.
A love of travel isn’t the only thing Boomers will bring to their roles as grandparents, of course. The Boomers’ long-term love affair with technology also will carry over into their relationships with their grandchildren, Smith notes.
“Technology is going to have a significant impact on grandparent-grandkid relationships. There will be e-mail conversations, e-mail birthday cards and technology gifts like software, computer games, CD-ROMS and so on. Virtual relationships may well displace interpersonal connections while increasing the frequency of interaction and contact between grandparents and grandkids.”
It’s not going to be all fun and games for the Boomer grandparents, however. On average, they will find that they have less time to spend with their extended families than did previous generations of grandparents. This will be particularly true for Boomer grandmothers, the first generation of grandmothers to be active participants in the workforce.
Many Boomers also will find themselves caught in a multigenerational sandwich as they struggle to care for their aging parents and sometimes their children and grandchildren as well, notes Stephanie Coontz, history professor at Evergreen State College in Olympia, Wash.
So there you have it: the inside scoop on the new breed of grandparents, members of a generation that is determined to do things its own way. The Boomers have left their mark on every other stage of life. Why should grandparenting be any different?
BOOMER GRANDPARENTING BY THE NUMBERS
– Grandparenting book titles listed at Amazon.com: 99
– Grandparents in America today: 69 million
– Percentage of grandparents who are Boomers: 50
– Grandparents in America by the year 2010: 80 million
– Spending power of grandparents in America by 2010: $40 billion per year (in 1999 dollars)
– Amount of money a typical grandparent spends on his or her grandchild each year (in 1999 dollars): $500
– Percentage of toy purchases made by grandparents today: 25
Sources: Norman Sherman, The Seniors Network Inc.; Bruce Clark, Age Wave IMPACT Inc.; Stephanie Coontz, Evergreen State College in Olympia, Wash.; Amazon.com.
