Let’s come to order, shall we? If we could get the baseball gods, those fellows in the corner with tobacco juice on their white beards, to stop laughing for a second and at least ponder the cosmic significance of an “L” Series, maybe we could have a discussion here. Thank you, gentlemen.
Even though our charge is to predict when the Cubs and the White Sox will make it to the World Series together, the first order of business is to say that there is almost nothing impressive about a Subway Series featuring the Yankees and Mets. That feels better, doesn’t it?
Both New York teams spent megabucks to build their rosters, both have won at least two World Series in the last 31 years and both have missed out on the kind of heroic struggle that has allowed the Cubs and White Sox such an extended stay at the Sahara Marriott.
Simply put, New York fans don’t know what it means to be so parched that tears taste good.
But what if there were an “L” Series? Hold it. Back up for a second. If we’re going to consider the topic, let’s be optimists right away.
Not if, but when?
“Not in my lifetime,” said former Sox announcer and major-league outfielder Jimmy Piersall, 71.
To which a true Chicago believer would say: You mean, it conceivably could happen in 20 years? Excellent!
“I can’t see it ever happening,” said Richard Lindberg, who has written four books on the White Sox and throws a pretty mean wet blanket.
Let’s be kind and say that almost everything would have to go right at the same time for an “L” Series to happen. For starters, the planets would have to align like winning lottery balls and every beauty queen’s greatest wish, world peace, would have to come true.
In other words, heaven and earth would have to move before an All-Chicago World Series could become more than a crazy thought. That, and the small detail of the Cubs becoming competitive again.
Can you imagine a World Series featuring the Cubs and the White Sox? The exhilaration? A North Side vs. South Side uncivil war? Of course you can’t. You live in Chicago. The last time the Sox won any kind of playoff series was 1917, which at least is better than the Cubs, who haven’t won a playoff series since 1908. Between them, they have lost 15 straight series in the postseason.
The only time the two teams met in a World Series was 1906, with the White Sox winning four games to two.
“I’ve heard some cynics say that the only way that either team would win a World Series would be to play the other one,” said Jim Callis, executive editor of Baseball America.
Let’s keep the sarcasm to a minimum.
Actually, Callis is one of the kinder souls when it comes to envisioning a future that includes an all-Chicago World Series. He at least is willing to consider the possibility that all of the Cubs’ top farm talent–including center-fielder Corey Patterson, first baseman Hee Seop Choi and pitcher Ben Christensen–somehow could blossom into above-average major-leaguers, and blossom soon.
The Sox, who were swept in the division series by Seattle, already are close, Callis and others say.
“The optimistic scenario would be three or four years–2003 at the earliest–for a Cubs-Sox series,” Callis said.
The Cubs pose something of a problem in that they’re really, really bad.
“The Cubs have lost 516 games in the last six years, and are 112 games below .500 in that time,” said Piersall, whom the Cubs fired as a part-time outfield instructor last year. “I’ll be dead before a Cubs-Sox World Series happens. I wish it would be different because the Cubs’ fans and Tribune Co. are great people despite the fact that everyone is putting them down.”
The Sox have excellent young players in Magglio Ordonez, Paul Konerko and Carlos Lee, as well as rising stars in the minors. The Cubs have so many holes that it’s hard to tell if there’s any fabric.
“I think they’re below average at catcher,” Callis said. “I like Mark Grace a lot, but if you compare him to an average first baseman in terms of power and RBI production, he’s probably a little below average. He might not be back.
“Eric Young had a good year at second base. They’re below average at short, below average at third. I like Rondell White in left. They’re probably below average in center, even though Damon Buford had a good year. They’re obviously fine in right with Sammy Sosa, although he’s costing them a lot of money.
“Their rotation, I like Jon Lieber a lot. You have to like Kerry Wood. He made progress. God, who’s their No. 3 starter? I guess the rest of the rotation isn’t really what you want.”
So that means the Cubs are average or above average at second base, left and right field and two pitching spots. Get your playoff tickets now.
Lindberg, who is the Sox’s unofficial historian, said there are several reasons why a Cubs-Sox World Series won’t happen. But while Cubs fans brace for the accusation that their club is to blame, listen first:
“I think it’s a different culture here,” Lindberg said. “The same high expectations that you have in New York don’t apply here. There’s real pressure on both the Yankees and the Mets to perform. New York is a much more demanding market. Winning is paramount to [Yankees owner] George Steinbrenner.
“I don’t see it happening here, ever. The Cubs because of the size of their ballpark (Wrigley Field, capacity: 38,957). The White Sox because they’re struggling against fan apathy and media indifference, among other things. There are major, major problems on both sides of town.
“It hasn’t happened since 1906, and there’s a good reason for it.”
That sort of pessimism isn’t going to get us anywhere. What we need to do is forget the past, even if that takes an industrial-strength sort of amnesia.
Best-selling author Scott Turow has been a lifelong Cub fan, as his father was before him. The best thing about the Subway Series, Turow said, is that afterward, you can say with certainty that New York lost, never mind the winner. But that sort of humor only brings him back to an “L” Series and his cloudy crystal ball.
“When will it happen?” the question was followed by a long sigh. “It doesn’t seem to be in the cards in the next five years, I would say. I think it’s a long way away.
“Obviously I am a Chicago sports fan, and so I will be watching with enormous interest next year hoping, as ever, that the rational side of me is wrong.”
We’re spending a lot of time with conjecture. It’s time to get serious. Laura, a psychic from Lyons, says she can predict the future. She reads palms, tarot cards and the sports pages. Laura, what do you see?
“I see the Cubs and the Sox together in 2008 or 2009,” she said.
Have you had your eyes examined recently?
“I feel it,” she said. “I picked up the vibes on that. It’s my feeling when I go into meditation. When I get good feelings, I know about it.”
Unfortunately, Laura said she can’t tell who will win the “L” Series. Maybe we’re getting too greedy anyway. Two Chicago teams in the World Series–think about it. It has been 94 years since that occurred.
Will there be anything special about the series?
“They’re going to try their best to win,” Laura said.
What a strange world that would be.
