Kid Rock and Anna Nicole Smith might go on a dream date to some of these lowbrow locations. You can call ’em trashy, but we prefer to think of these unpretentious–and unrepentant–activities as a way to find out if your date’s really any fun.
Fat Willy’s Rib Shack
Being able to scarf down sloppy barbecue face-to-face is perhaps the best measure of how comfortable two people are with each other. And this friendly, blues-y little joint–across from Logan Square’s City North 14 Theater–welcomes a mess: Your ribs and chicken come on wax paper-lined metal trays, and every rawhide-covered table has its own roll of brown paper towels. 2416 W. Schubert Ave. 773-782-1800.
WWE SmackDown!
Spandex! Muscles! Folding chairs! Whether you think of choreographed violence as an art form, or you just like watching people hurl each other to the floor, WWE SmackDown! promises a smashing good time. 7:30 p.m. April 8. $20-$45. Allstate Arena, 6920 N. Mannheim Rd. Rosemont. 312-559-1212.
Devil in a Woodpile at Hideout
This trio plays everything from blues to country to “hillbilly,” and isn’t afraid to use a washboard as an instrument. They draw a crowd every Tuesday to Hideout, an out-of-the-way hole in the wall where Pabst Blue Ribbon flows like water. 9:30 p.m. 1354 W. Wabansia Ave. 773-227-4433.
Jerry Springer Show
Get your fill of love triangles, revealed secrets and fake fights with a trip to Chicago’s own daytime circus. It’ll make whatever baggage the two of you are hiding from each other seem innocent by comparison. Just make sure you get to the NBC Tower early–studio audiences can be overbooked. 454 N. Columbus Dr. 312-321-5365.
Hogs and Honeys
T&A reigns supreme at this prefab honky-tonk (1555 N. Sheffield Ave. 312-377-1733), where bar-top dancing and female bartenders pouring tequila down your throat are de rigueur. Live out your “Urban Cowboy” fantasy on the bar’s mechanical bull, and chow down roadhouse favorites like brisket and ribs–even deep-fried Twinkies. The new Coyote Ugly Saloon (316 W. Erie St. 312-642-2400) has a similar but raunchier ambience, with barely dressed female “coyotes” whipping male patrons and performing body shots.
Route 66 Raceway
Whether you drive a Dodge Neon, a hot rod, or a snowmobile, you can blow down a quarter-mile cement drag strip with all the lights and timers at the weekly Test & Tune event. This free-for-all for speed demons starts April 5. $10, plus $25 to enter race. 500 Speedway Blvd. Joliet. 815-727-7223.
BASSPROV
Fictional fishing buddies Donny and Earl (played by improv veterans Mark Sutton and Joe Bill) solve the world’s problems, “one beer at a time” in this improv show. Bring a 12-pack of Hamm’s to this BYOB show and match them beer for beer. 8:30 p.m. Mondays, starting April 7. $10. WNEP Theater, 3209 N. Halsted St. 773-755-1693.
