The FBI is warning police to be alert for people carrying almanacs, saying that the reference books could be used for terrorist planning. Well, it’s about time. Anybody who has read the Vital Statistics section knows how dangerous almanacs can be. But for the love f Stephen King don’t stop there. The Tempo Subcommittee on Literary Terrorism urges police to also be alert for air travelers packing these books:
“1,000 Places to See Before You Die.” What if the reader has just finished visiting No. 1,000?
“Running With Scissors.” Somebody is going to get hurt.
“Leonardo Up Close and Personal.” As in DiCaprio. Imagine the terror of sitting next to this reader on an international flight.
“The Five People You Meet in Heaven.” The syrupy prose could corrupt even the most law-abiding citizen. Plus, why are they so interested in the afterlife?
“Train.” So, why are they at the airport?
“The Secret Life of Bees.” Not them too.
“The Devil Wears Prada.” Talk about a bomb.
“Tale of Despereaux: Being the Story of a Mouse, a Princess, Some Soup, and a Spool of Thread.” Sounds to us like the ingredients for trouble.
“Holy Blood, Holy Grail.” Holy moly.
