By now we’re all sick and tired of hearing about how everyone’s sick and tired of the cold, so stop the complaining and do something about it. You may not have the dough for a vacation, but sitting under a thatched roof sipping a pina colada is sure to ease your winter blues. Bring your imagination and find a bit of the tropics right here in Chicago.
Cafe Laguardia
If your escape involves channeling Tony Montana and reciting key lines from “Scarface,” we’ve got just the place for you. Break out the leisure suit and head to this long-standing Cuban restaurant, where animal prints abound and the lounge is perfect for lounging. The limey and potent mojitos and caipirinhas are the best choice if you’re going native, but a long list of froufrou drinks, including pina coladas and strawberry daiquiris, also are an option. Hungry? Try Laguardia’s signature Cuban nachos that sub crispy plantains for standard tortilla chips. 2111 W. Armitage Ave. 773-862-5996.
Rock-a-Tiki
At this Wicker Park spot, curvy thatched roofs top comfy booths, tiki lamps hang from the ceiling and palm fronds (albeit fake) are stuck here and there. Basically, the vibe here couldn’t be more laid-back if it were in slow-motion. There’s a menu of tropical standards such as coconut shrimp and spare ribs, and Elvis impersonator Mark Hussman gets all shook up on Wednesdays. The bartenders make pretty stiff drinks–tough enough to compete with the frilly umbrellas they’re garnished with. Go for potions such as the Touch My Tiki (Absolut Mandarin, Grand Marnier, cranberry and orange juices) or the Shrunken Skull (red rum, VooDoo Spiced Rum, lime juice, grenadine and soda). 1942 W. Division St. 773-384-8454.
Tropic Island Jerk Chicken
For a restaurant owner to put a menu item in the title of his place, he’s got to be pretty confident about that dish. The Jamaican-born owner, Roy, won’t tell what’s in his family’s jerk marinade, but whatever he’s using is doing the trick and keeping his customers loyal. The only crux is that it’s a carryout operation, so grab your chicken, stop off at the store for some Red Stripe, jack up the heat in your apartment and create your own vacation, mon. 537 E. 79th St. 773-224-7768.
Hala Kahiki
Out in River Grove lies a mecca for all things Polynesian–from the extensive fruity drink list to the staff of “Love Boat” extras, to the constant plink of ukuleles emanating from the speakers. The regulars can be spotted lounging in wicker chairs sipping zombies (a passion fruit-papaya-rum concoction) but we prefer the volcano, a Bacardi 151 cocktail lit on fire for dramatic effect. Hala Kahiki also happens to be home to the country’s third-largest Witco collection, a now-defunct line of collectible tiki-inspired furnishings. Playboy Papa Hugh Hefner ranks No. 2 among collectors and, no surprise, the King’s Graceland tops the list. 2834 River Rd., River Grove, 708-456-3222.
Trader Vic’s
Nestled in the Palmer House Hilton is the granddaddy of Polynesian-themed escapes. Trader Vic’s founder Victor Bergeron is the man credited with inventing the mai tai back in 1944, and ever since, the fruity rum drink has become synonymous with tropical getaways. Order the original in the beach-themed room for only $4 from 4:30 to 6:30 p.m. on Thursdays and Fridays, or sample some sushi in the dressier dining room. 17 E. Monroe St. 312-917-7317.
Taste the tropics
These drinks are paradise in a glass
Flaming mai tai, $11
Stop by on Sneaky Tiki Wednesdays and suck down these 32-ounce flaming cocktails, pina coladas served in hollowed-out pineapples ($9) and mojitos ($6). Fizz Bar and Grill, 3220 N. Lincoln Ave. 773-348-6088.
Hawaiian martini, $9
This island-inspired concoction is a mix of Stoli Vanil, Stoli vodka and infused pineapple. Roy’s, 720 N. State St. 312-787-7599.
Pisco Sour, $6
This drink, popular in South America, is made with Pisco (a liqueur distilled from grapes), lemon juice and sugar, and topped with cinnamon. Rinconcito Sudamericano, 1954 W. Armitage Ave. 773-489-3126.
