River Kwai Seafood II
1650 W. Belmont Ave.
773-472-1013
River Kwai Seafood II doesn’t open for another half-hour, but I’m already late. A line has formed outside this Thai restaurant’s Belmont Avenue front door. Ivan Svestka, 28, and his wife Danielle, 26, have driven from suburban North Riverside, braving frosty temps to secure first place in line. They’re poised to pounce when Kwai opens at 11 p.m.
Not that these two mind waiting. And at River Kwai, waiting’s half the fun. By the time the doors open, the place is packed.
Since first opening this low-slung, almost cave-like space in 1986, River Kwai II has nurtured a late-night cult following to rival “The Rocky Horror Picture Show.” White stucco walls bear an odd assortment of Thai bric-a-brac mixed with a space-alien motif. A goofy plastic bust of an outer-space creature greets you at the counter. During a renovation a couple of years ago, a regular customer who runs a comic book store helped the owners decorate. For their part, the Svestkas supplied some coffee mugs.
Tonight’s line is short. In warmer weather, folks line up on the sidewalk with lawn furniture to reserve a good spot. You’d think Springsteen was working the wok. Instead, you’ll usually find two Thai brothers who’ve turned their kitchen into an unlikely destination for some fiercely loyal night owls.
“I won’t eat anywhere else,” Danielle says. “It’s spoiled me for other Thai food.” Not that she’s tried much else, she admits. Ivan, who has been a regular for the past 13 years, initiated her.
They’re now part of a contingent of immigrants, cops, cabbies, bar-hoppers, suburbanites and insomniacs who feel a certain affinity. They greet one another with the same silent, knowing nods. Sure, they laud the lard na, but it’s the sense that they’re being personally catered to that’s hooked them. “We enjoy having people who know us make our food,” Danielle says.
Typically, customers order six or seven entrees at a time, producing a logjam in the kitchen. Regardless of when they order, all customers hear the same thing: “Two hour! Two hour!” Translation: Shut up, sit down and wait.
Good luck getting a table; River Kwai only has six, and larger groups will pull a couple together. We watched a Spanish-speaking family gather over a deck of cards to bide their time. Others serve themselves tea.
The menu mixes Thai and Chinese favorites: eggrolls, fried rice, cashew chicken and Thai pepper steak. Seafood fare includes lightly breaded fish balls, fried mussels and shrimp. Tonight, however, we were only allowed to order from the appetizer and curry portions of the menu. As the sign above the kitchen says: “This is not Burger King. You don’t get it your way.”
So is the food really worth the wait? The dishes I sampled were certainly good, but I can’t say it was two-hour-wait good. The green curry was fresh, with huge chunks of tender chicken, coarse shards of green pepper and slivers of bamboo shoots swimming in a bright yellow, coconut-milk curry. Pleasant, if a little bland. The enormous family-sized portion ultimately became a bit of a chore. The spicy beef was decent, if a bit greasy. But it had plenty of fresh basil and tomato, though the latter ingredient wasn’t listed on the menu description.
I shouldn’t complain: Despite being told it would be two hours, my order arrived in a little over a half-hour. At River Kwai, I guess it pays to show up early.
Opening nightly
Need more late-night nosh, but sick of diner food? Try these spots for post-midnight meals.
Triple Crown Restaurant
Open until 2 a.m., this Chinatown favorite is just the place for late-night Cantonese seafood. 211 W. 22nd Pl. 312-791-0788.
Iggy’s
Open until 4 a.m. (5 a.m. on Saturdays), this is a popular post-disco breakfast spot. Try Iggy’s special eggs with an Ohio Sunrise, made with Mandarin vodka and orange-cranberry and grapefruit juices. 700 N. Milwaukee Ave. 312-829-4449.
Delhi Darber Kabob House
Open until 5 a.m., this Rogers Park spot serves authentic Indo-Pakistani and is a favorite of cabbies. 6403 N. California Ave. 773-338-1818.
