CADDY SHAFT
So The Donald announced that he’ll play at the American Century golf tournament, a big celebrity affair with lots of athletes and actors broadcast on national TV. Does this mean that The Rancic will be his caddy?
Bat check
Let’s look at how the White Sox’s Juan Uribe is performing lately.
Last game: 0 for 2 vs. Blue Jays (.000)
Previous 3 games: 8 for 11 (.727)
April 2004: 24 for 61 (.393)
April 2003: Did not play.
Talk is cheap
When LaTroy Hawkins closed the scoreless eighth inning on two popups with two Cardinals on base, it screamed, “Meet the new Cubs.” When Sammy Sosa and Moises Alou followed by popping out on a pitch each to end the ninth, it whispered, “Same as the old Cubs.”
She said it . . .
“I think my husband has a stubborn streak. He’s not willing to quit.”
–Jean Springer
whose 90-year-old husband Max set world records for men ages 90-94 in the 3,000 meters, 800, long jump and triple jump at the USA Masters Indoor Track and Field Championships
Whizzer’s week ahead
Our pooch predicts the week ahead.
Monday: Kevin Garnett wins NBA MVP but forgets to thank me.
Tuesday: White Sox beat the Orioles in the 9th.
Wednesday: Lakers beat the Spurs in Game 2.
Thursday: I weep during the “Friends” finale.
Friday: I don’t weep as Pistons dump the Nets in Game 2.
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Compiled by Phillip Thompson
