Somebody pass this note along to Paul Hamm. If they come to take away your gold medal, just tell them you misplaced it. That’s how I got to keep my Grammy.
The Miami Dolphins are trying to get
$8.6 million back from Ricky Williams, which led Williams to call the Dolphins. I have a feeling he called collect.
Think about this one: White Sox rookie Joe Borchard already has struck out more times this season than Barry Bonds.
Did you think about it? OK then. You may return to your doughnut.
Looks like Portland is going to build a $350 million baseball stadium even though the Expos are probably going to Northern Virginia. It’s not unprecedented to have a new stadium but no team. I mean, look at the Bears.
Yao Ming, on the Chinese commitment to funding sports: “As we say in China, the beans are out of the bottle.”
As we say in America, “Light a match!”
The White Sox are charging $200 next year for new seats behind home plate. Fine by me. But that’s a lot to pay for $40 seats.
Just for the record, I’m not in Jenna Jameson’s new kiss-and-tell book. But that doesn’t mean she won’t be in mine.
The Closing Ceremonies are over, and it’s just dawning on me how sad I’ll be now that the Olympics are over. But as NBC taught us, that just means “Joey” can’t be too far behind. Efharisto, NBC. Efharisto.
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The list
5 things I would do for $8.6 million.
Play for the Yankees as a reserve infielder.
Eat 8.6 million cheese doodles.
Swim under the Dave Matthews Band bus.
Get hit in the head by falling concrete at Wrigley Field.
Pose for ESPN the Magazine in a wedding dress.
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redeyesports@tribune.com, Edited by the sports staff of RedEye.
