Wrigley Field and U.S. Cellular should show World Series games on drive-in theater movie screens for fans, and after each game ends, we’ll all meet downtown and cry in each other’s beers.
I’m all about people helping people. Unless those people are Cardinals fans.
Speaking of which, Cardinals pitcher
Julian Tavarez broke his left hand during a dugout tantrum. See, this is why we should all punch pillows.
Tavarez punched a dugout phone. Can you hear me now? Good. You’re a dolt.
The phone’s OK. Shaken up but OK. It appreciates your flowers and calls.
I’d like to point out that someone named Whizzer said before the playoffs that the Astros win it all. Just so you know.
Weirdest NFL collapse: The Chiefs. They’re 1-4 after going 13-3 last season. That would never, ever, ever happen in Chicago.
See, the Bears went 13-3 in 2001, then started 2-4 in 2002. Big difference.
The NFL trade deadline passed, and I remain in town. How much whining do I have to do before you people get on the horn with Philly and get a deal done?
An unhappy Jerry Rice got traded to
Seattle because a trip to the rainy Pacific Northwest always cheers people up. Jerry, you were the greatest ever, and now you are 42. Please, don’t just linger.
Alvin Harrison is the latest U.S. sprinter to be banned for taking performance-enhancing drugs. Never heard of him, never met him, and if you ask me that in court, I’ll say exactly the same thing.
FIVE THINGS
Five things that happened the year Chiefs coach Dick Vermeil was born (1936):
Boulder Dam (later Hoover Dam) is finished.
Jesse Owens wins 4 Olympic gold medals.
Franklin Roosevelt is re-elected president.
Statue of Liberty turns 50.
Baseball Hall of Fame names first inductees.
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redeyesports@tribune.com, Edited by the sports staff of RedEye.
