1. Relax, don’t do it
Did you see any potential Bears in that Orange Bowl game? Really? I need you to dial it down a little bit, OK? Take some time off, do a crossword, breathe.
2. Not true but still …
USC and Oklahoma wound up flying out of Miami together, and before the peanuts were handed out, the Trojans led, 21-0.
3. His split ends
ESPN says USC QB Matt Leinart has been seen with Jessica Simpson’s assistant. Maybe he’s just looking for hair tips.
4. Bad news, Sox fans
Twins manager Ron Gardenhire is getting a two-year extension after three division titles in three seasons.
5. Good news, Sox fans
The seats at U.S. Cellular are getting painted green with envy.
6. Block, Sajak, block!
Rex Grossman is part of the ongoing NFL players week on “Wheel of Fortune.” Hope he doesn’t get hurt on the third spin.
7. Lean on me
Are you sitting down? The Pro Rodeo Hall of Fame and Museum of the American Cowboy has been closed. Here, have a tissue.
8. Get a life
Got an e-mail that said “Three days until playoff fantasy football begins!” Great Caesar’s ghost, it never ends.
9. Pronouncing we will go
Peyton Manning gets NFL’s Offensive Player of the Year even though Jonathan Quinn’s performance was more offensive.
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FIVETHINGS…
Five deserving names missing from
The Sporting News Power 100:
– Lindsay Lohan: Federal law mandates she makes every list.
– Super Bowl streaker: He put it all on the line.
– Bears punter Brad Maynard: What. A. Crime.
– Me: Damn them.
– My agent: Or “my agent for now.”
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redeyesports@tribune.com; Edited by the sports staff of RedEye.




