1. Nobody told me
With the Super Bowl over, we can all brace for the next big game: The Pro Bowl! No, wait. The Stanley Cup! Damn, hang on,
I’ll get it.
2. Here’s what we need
Too bad life isn’t recorded. We could just TiVo ahead to the March Madness.
3. Suck it up
“I’m sick to my stomach,” Eagles fan Anthony Barone said. “And I’m sick of saying ‘There’s always next year.’ ” And I’m sick of Britney Spears. But somehow I get up every day.
4. Write this down, kids
It’s always funny to see a dancing bear kick Burt Reynolds in the groin.
Always.
5. All we got is memories
The 1985 Super Bowl Bears might market themselves. I cannot tell you how long I’ve been waiting for a Maury Buford lunchbox.
6. It’s only proper
It’s official: 15-year-old golfer Michelle Wie gets to play in the Women’s British Open. But only if she changes her name to Michelle Wee.
7. Look! Wild pigeons!
When Cubs’ single-game tickets go on sale on Feb. 25, the wristband system makes camping out obsolete. But if you still want to pitch a tent, make S’mores and enjoy the relaxing quiet of Clark and Addison Streets. Hey, whatever.
8. So drinks are on me
“I, Max,” that thing resembling a TV show, ends Feb. 18.
9. The Burn Rubber Diet
NASCAR driver Elliot Sadler says he loses up to 12 pounds during a race. So folks, don’t walk. Drive!
FIVETHINGS…
My five least-TiVo’d moments from Sunday:
– A preview for Vin Diesel’s
“The Pacifier.”
– That absolutely horrible onsides kick execution.
– The Food Network’s “Supper Bowl.”
– Up close and personal Turfcam shot
of the Patriots’ long snapper’s armpits.
– Anything involving Tom Arnold.
