Was it ordained from birth that you be a mortician? My dad stressed that I go to college. If I wanted to come back, I could. I got a degree in business.
Has it helped? A lot of funeral home owners don’t have that business background. I think it’s a leg up.
Why do shows like “Six Feet Under” or “Family Plots” do well? I don’t think the public’s ever seen the behind-the-scenes of our business portrayed so truthfully.
For example? In “Six Feet Under,” they discuss ads for embalming chemicals and caskets. People don’t know about that. If one of my friends comes by and sees a trade publication, they’re amazed you can open a magazine and read about the latest embalming fluids.
So is yours like the funeral home on “Family Plots?” That one’s so dysfunctional. Ours is just pretty normal.
What’s the oddest request you ever had? There was an older guy in town, a real practical joker, and a nursing-home nurse gave him a remote-controlled box that made flatulence noises. When he died, his sons said they wanted to put the box in the casket. They sat in the front row and when people came up to view the body, they pressed the button Everyone was laughing. They knew this was how he’d want to go out.
What was your hardest funeral? Besides my parents, I’d say my cousin’s daughter. She was 8 and was killed in a horse accident. Doing the prep work on her was very hard.
You personally embalmed your parents? I once asked my dad, “Who embalmed Grandpa?” He told me he had. When I seemed amazed, he explained, “That’s what we do, Larry.” It was one of the last things he could do to honor his father. So I always had that in the back of my head, that I’d have to do that for my dad.
And when the time came? When he was dying unexpectedly after surgery, I was in Michigan. Driving back, all I could think of was that tonight I have to watch my father die and then I’ll have to embalm him. He did it for his father and I had to do it for mine.
And your mother? When she died, no, I just couldn’t do it.
