TODAY’S QUESTIONS
TOPIC 1: DID ANY OF YOU PICK OFF A JOEY HARRINGTON PASS SUNDAY?
TOPIC 2: COMPARE OUR CITY’S MOOD THE DAY AFTER A BEARS LOSS TO THE DAY AFTER A BEARS WIN.
TOPIC 3: WHAT ARE SOX FANS TELLING ONE ANOTHER THIS MORNING?
TOPIC 4: DESCRIBE WHAT EDDY CURRY IS DOING ON THE NBA’s OPENING NIGHT.
TOPIC 5: THE WORLD RECORD FOR NON-STOP TV VIEWING IS 69 HOURS, 48 MINUTES. WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE WATCHED?
JIMMY GREENFIELD
Sure, and I also ran for 100 yards, forced two fumbles and took home a $484,000 game check.
One feels similar to a horrible hangover, and the other like still being gloriously drunk.
“Why does my stomach feel like I just ate 5 pounds of rancid chili?”
Sitting on the Bulls bench and weeping over making only $5.14 million. Poor kid.
Sports … Porn … Sports … Porn … “Bewitched” reruns … Sports … Porn … Sports … Porn.
PHIL THOMPSON
The only thing I intercepted was a communique to his coach: It reads: “Bench me. Stop. I suck. Stop.”
It’s like being picked for jury duty, then realizing it’s for “Judge Judy.”
“Get off that ledge!
With our luck, you’d just land
on Paul Konerko.”
Rejected by the only team he has known, he’ll be on the rebound. Naturally, he’ll miss it.
Non-stop life-coaching on “Starting Over.” After hour 22, it’s technically considered a lobotomy.
LEO EBERSOLE
Nah, he didn’t throw me anything. But in my defense, I happened to be wearing Lions colors.
It’s similar to Rob Schneider’s mood the day after Adam Sandler decides to make another movie.
“Swallow this pill, and you’ll wake up with no memory of this.”
Leading the AND 1 Mixtape Tour team to another razzle-dazzle
victory.
Every episode of “The Sopranos.” And then, to lighten the mood, “Requiem for a Dream.”
WHIZZER
Nope, but I drew a personal foul for head-butting Leo during a commercial.
After a win, people actually talk to each other on the sidewalk.
“We control our own destiny.
Then again, the Indians control theirs too.”
Nicknaming himself “the next Elvis” as the new Memphis
Grizzlies center.
CTA security camera footage.
And I’d use the microphone to command commuters to dance.
BAG BOY
I was about the only guy in a Bears jersey who didn’t.
Losses = Hangovers.
Wins = Bigger hangovers.
“CLEVE-LAND SUCKS!
CLEVE-LAND SUCKS!”
Letting someone drop 20 points on him by halftime.
The tape of Sunday’s Bears game 33 times.
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E-mail redeyesports@tribune.com.
