TODAY’S QUESTIONS
TOPIC 1: Why do the Sox prefer to be the underdogs?
TOPIC 2: The Bulls open the preseason Tuesday. Explain why it’s this early.
TOPIC 3: Any guesses on the lawsuit settlement between Mike Price and Sports Illustrated?
TOPIC 4: What’s more likely than Chicago playing host to the 2016 Olympics?
TOPIC 5: Detroit is on top of the NFC North. How does this keep happening?
JIMMY GREENFIELD
So they don’t feel weird wearing silk underwear and a cape on their back.
To battle against all the buzz over the NHL. (pause) HAHAHAHAHA!
No idea how much, but I’m guessing he had it paid to him in singles.
That one of the sports will be “Bean” jumping.
They want it more. Or rather, they don’t not want it less.
LEO EBERSOLE
They play with a chip on their shoulder. In Bobby Jenks’ case, it’s a pepper jack-flavored Dorito.
Because Scott Skiles’ family would really rather he made Jannero Pargo run fast-break drills.
A BLT, an omelet and a roll of dollar bills.
Jimmy making the cover of Italian Vogue. Evil Supercomputer, I could see …
A freak laboratory accident has given them a spider’s abilities and the Indianapolis Colts’ schedule.
WHIZZER
Because if they were the overdogs, they wouldn’t exist.
Ever since Michael Bay’s “The Island,” this nation craves more and more meaningless action.
A lifetime supply of SI shoe phones.
Blue monkeys flying out of Leo’s butt. Yes, “blue.” Pink ones fly out all the time.
They’re an hour ahead.
EVIL SUPERCOMPUTER
Because 50 percent of the time underdogs win half the games.
Maybe I reset the world’s calendar and it’s really November. It could happen.
A laptop computer. A really hot-looking one with a flat screen and sexy speakers and …
This question is moot.
In 2016, I will control the earth. BOW TO ME!
Well, 2-2 beats 1-3 but 6 fears 7 because it 8, 9 and 10.
BAG BOY
It’s smart. Have low expectations. It’s the story of my life.
Because to go more than three months without NBA hoops is
un-American.
Whatever the sum, I hope he had SI shove it down his pants.
Sox play host to the World Series. Talk about a lay-up.
Even a 2-2 team can wind up 2-14.
———-
E-mail us at redeyesports@tribune.com.
