Admit it, you never doubted that Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore really got married, even when “Access Hollywood” caught wind of a questionable e-mail suggesting the ceremony was a “Punk’d” prank.
Well, the wedding is officially official now that OK! magazine has published exclusive photos of the event (and the Kutchers presumably pocketed a fat check). So what other celebrities should go ahead and confirm what’s plain for the world to see?
Ben Affleck
ADMIT IT: You secretly covet the office of President of the United States. Everything you’ve done since “Mallrats” has been a calculated step toward running the country. You courted the gay and lesbian vote with “Chasing Amy,” the veteran vote with “Pearl Harbor” and the Latina vote by nearly marrying Jennifer Lopez. Yes, you’re simply biding your time. Another decade of marriage to Jennifer Garner, maybe two more kids, and you’re gonna make your run. Just don’t appoint Matt Damon chairman of the National Endowment for the Arts.
Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony
ADMIT IT: You’re married, for crying out loud! What incentive do you have to be married–living and working together–and not acknowledge it? At this point an admission would be more comical than anything else.
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie
ADMIT IT: You’re a couple. Together. Canoodling. No more arriving at events separately or playing coy during interviews. We don’t have to know your wedding plans (if there are any), but just admit you’re dating already. Could be a fun Diane Sawyer interview.
50 Cent (top) and Fat Joe
ADMIT IT: You’re a couple. Just kidding. But admit that your “beef” doesn’t really exist and it’s just a ploy to sell records. We’ll buy that you have beef with The Game–somebody from his crew got shot and there are some hard feelings there–but this business with Fat Joe over a few lyrics is tired. There doesn’t have to be a big hug for the cameras; just say you’ve moved on.
MUSIC NOTES
Around the world of sound
Boy meets world
Chicago rockers Fall Out Boy are dance, dancing to a new beat.
Bassist Pete Wentz tells mtv.com the band has written a batch of new songs and is “itching” to start work on a follow-up album to their hit “From Under the Cork Tree.”
“I don’t know how much we’ve even spoken to our label (Island Records) about this, but we’re going to try and go into the studio this summer,” Wentz said.
Fans expecting more hook-heavy, up-tempo hits like “Sugar We’re Goin’ Down” might want to prepare for a change of pace.
“They’re way different,” Wentz said of the songs he and singer Patrick Stump have written, “the songs are way more soulful.
“On the last record, the lyrics were about ‘This is where we’re going to be a year from now, and this is what you’re going to be saying about us,’ but this time we realized that a lot of bands should spend less time running their mouths and more time writing their songs.”
Mistress distress
Rush Limbaugh, celebrity gossiper?
The conservative radio host was talking about a list of “ubersexuals”–a term coined by an ad agency to one-up “metrosexuals”–when he blurted out that Bono has a mistress, the New York Post reports.
A caller asked Limbaugh what basis he had for making the claim about the U2 singer, who has been married for 23 years. “You people are just going to have to trust me on this,” Limbaugh reportedly replied.
Huh?
“This is so absurd it doesn’t deserve a response,” the band’s publicist told the Post. “However, Bono and Edge have been spending a lot of time together in New York lately …”
