Santa Claus is the richest man in the world.
Well, he’s the richest man on Forbes magazine’s Fictional 15, a cheeky list of the most powerful movers and shakers that don’t … really … exist. (Sorry, kids.)
The rest of Forbes’ top five:
2. Oliver “Daddy” Warbucks (“Annie”)
3. Richie Rich
4. Lex Luthor (“Superman”)
5. C. Montgomery Burns (“The Simpsons”)
It’s a fine list, and a fine spoof of Forbes’ traditional rankings of the rich and famous. But, c’mon. We’re just scratching the surface here.
PEOPLE’S SEXIEST FICTIONAL MEN ALIVE
1. Sudoku Ninja
2. Duke (“G.I. Joe”)
3. Lion-O (“Thundercats”)
ESQUIRE’S SEXIEST FICTIONAL WOMEN ALIVE
1. Jessica Rabbit (“Who Framed Roger Rabbit”)
2. Lara Croft (“Tomb Raider”)*
3. Paris Hilton
SPORTS ILLUSTRATED’S FICTIONAL SPORTSMEN OF THE YEAR
1. Drederick Tatum (“The Simpsons”)
2. Speedy Gonzalez
3. Bruce Wayne*
SWIMMING WORLD MAGAZINE’S THREE FICTIONAL CHARACTERS WHO WOULD MAKE TERRIBLE LIFEGUARDS
1. Shake (“Aqua Teen Hunger Force”)
2. Stewie Griffin (“Family Guy”)
3. Kitt (“Knight Rider”)
COOK’S ILLUSTRATED’S FICTIONAL CHARACTERS WHO WOULD MAKE A DELICIOUS ENTREE
1. Babe (“Babe: Pig in the City”)
2. Benny the Bull
3. Scrooge McDuck (“DuckTales”)*
ROLLING STONE’S GREATEST FICTIONAL BANDS EVER
1. Chuck E. Cheese and his musical friends
2. The Misfits (“Jem”)
3. Puffy AmiYumi
HIGH TIMES MAGAZINE’S DRUGGIES OF THE YEAR
1. Tyrone Biggums (“Chappelle’s Show”)
2. Jeff Spicoli (“Fast Times at Ridgemont High”)
3. SpongeBob SquarePants
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* Also on Forbes’ Fictional 15
