MLB officials are taking their own sweet time on those possible Cubs and Sox suspensions. Makes me mad enough to slug somebody.
2. Love is in the air
How excited are the Bulls after landing the second draft pick? Word is Bulls GM John Paxson was jumping up and down on Oprah’s couch.
3. Playing it safe
If you’re whining because the Bulls and others can’t draft Greg Oden right out of high school, you’re probably wearing an Eddy Curry jersey right now. Stop doing both of those things.
4. Take a memo
Now that Frank Thomas’ return is out of the way, let’s please get back to NOT cheering opposing home runs.
5. One shining moment
Want to know how those 1,000 NBA draft lottery Ping-Pong balls spend the rest of the year? Half work as cat toys while a number of others train for the Summer Olympics.
6. Coincidental minors
Anaheim, Edmonton, Buffalo, Carolina. Four NHL conference finalists, four places I will never vacation in.
7. Slow ride
Nike and iPod have a system that let’s your running shoes communicate with your Nano. My shoes, of course, will be telling my iPod to fetch them beers.
8. Hot picks
Pistons over Heat, Mavs over Suns, Mavs over Pistons, and Mark Cuban bursts into a ball of flame.
9. Compromising position
Reggie Bush wants to wear No. 5 for the Saints. The NFL ruled he can’t because, well, because the NFL is nuts. My solution: Wear the fraction 25/5.
FIVE THINGS …
Alternate jersey solutions for Bush:
– Wear four No. 5 jerseys, callit “No. 20.”
– Reggie Bush, No. V.
– Play in the nude.
– Ask the NFL for No. 8.
– Screw it, and just go back to school.
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redeyesports@tribune.com
