TODAY’S QUESTIONS
TOPIC 1: How could Sunday have been any rougher for Mark Prior?
Jimmy Greenfield: His postgame filet mignon came rare, and he ordered it … medium.
Brian Moore: He could have given up 4 HRs instead of 3. That would have been utterly embarrassing.
Whizzer: He could’ve paid good money to see “The Lake House.”
Bag Boy: He could have been pitching naked. I’ve had that nightmare, and it’s terrifying.
Stick Figure: I’m going to camp for the entire summer. My mom says it’s for the best.
TOPIC 2: Describe the U.S. team’s 1-1 tie against Italy.
Jimmy Greenfield: Abbondanza!
Brian Moore: A gift, since the other team scored for them.
Whizzer: A delightful bouquet with just a hint of wild raspberries.
Bag Boy: I haven’t seen a 10-on-9 situation like that since the Steve Bartman game.
Stick Figure: My best and only friend is a soccer ball. His name is Kicky. He’s shy.
TOPIC 3: Give the U.S. some strategy for the upcoming Ghana match.
Jimmy Greenfield: Melt their skulls using X-Ray vision. If no X-Ray vision, aim for the corners.
Brian Moore: Book your plane tickets home now.
Whizzer: See the ball, kick the ball.
Bag Boy: Same as for the Cubs: Score more and pray that other teams lose.
Stick Figure: LOOK! A ROBIN! SPRING IS HERE!
TOPIC 4: Why shouldn’t the Bulls use the No. 2 pick on Adam Morrison?
Jimmy Greenfield: He’s a thief. Hey Adam, I want my high school mustache back.
Brian Moore: Because he’s an overrated player from an overrated college–plus that “porno” mustache.
Whizzer: Because if they do, I’ll cry.
Bag Boy: Don’t fight destiny, his destiny being a hall-of-fame career with the Celtics.
Stick Figure: You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but don’t pick a nosy friend.
TOPIC 5: In what other sport would Jack Black’s ‘Nacho Libre’ character excel?
Jimmy Greenfield: Cheese whizzing. And if you go, please, wear a poncho.
Brian Moore: Something tells me he’d be great in pro bowling–as the ball.
Whizzer: Now see, THAT’S the guy the Bulls should take with the No. 2 pick.
Bag Boy: Golf. It would give me one good reason to finally tune in and watch.
Stick Figure: Scrabble is a fun game to play as long as you don’t keep score.
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