Having given up on a possible Cubs-Sox World Series long ago, it’s clearly going to be the Sox vs. the Cardinals in October. But despite Tuesday’s blowout win, I’ve picked a few plays and predicted how we can make it more fun for Game 1 of the Fall Classic.
1st inning
NOW: With two men on, Cards single, and the first runner beats the throw home, and the second runner winds up on third.
THEN: With two men on, Cards single, but the hot smash clips the ankle of the runner at second causing 1) the inning’s third out 2) that player to sit for the rest of the series.
3rd inning
NOW: Joe Crede doubles. Brian Anderson doubles. Tadahito Iguchi singles. Jim Thome singles. Paul Konerko singles. Jermaine Dye singles. A.J. Pierzynski homers. Juan Uribe singles. Crede homers. Pablo Ozuna singles. Iguchi singles. Thome walks. Konerko singles.
THEN: Crede homers. Anderson homers. Iguchi homers. Thome homers. Konerko homers. Dye homers. Pierzynski hits inside-the-park homer. Uribe homers. Crede hits homer with his bare hand. Konerko hits a ball so hard it disintegrates over the Dan Ryan.
5th inning
NOW: Down 13-1, Cards can’t score a run.
THEN: Down 13-1, Cards ask Sox pitchers to throw underhanded. Sox agree. Cards go down 1-2-3.
6th inning
NOW: Down 16-2, Cards pitcher drills two Sox batters in a row, and the umpire issues warnings.
THEN: Cards pitcher throws at a batter but mistakenly drills Tony La Russa. Somebody’s got to wear it.
7th inning
NOW: Celebrity Cubs fan Jeremy Piven is nowhere to be seen at Tuesday’s game.
THEN: Piven is spotted in a third-base seat and immediately ejected from the park via catapult.
9th inning
NOW: Sox bullpen closes out the game.
THEN: Ozzie Guillen closes out the game. Cards go down 1-2-3.
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redeyesports@tribune.com
