1. The ugly truth
I totally believe that height and good looks get you ahead in the workplace, which is why I’m expecting a promotion approximately, um, never.
2. Need a lift?
The best part about today’s cover story is reading that taller people make more money. Finally, a socially acceptable excuse for me to wear heels to the office.
3. Drama, for her
“The O.C.” has inspired two new fragrances. One is a blend of fruits and flowers. The other is a blend of booze, expensive handbags and ratings stunts.
4. All systems go
The president passed his annual physical despite a number of threats to his blood pressure, including the Middle East and reruns of “Two and a Half Men.”
5. V for vanity
“V for Vendetta” is out on DVD. You might recall that it was the movie Natalie Portman shaved her head for. Or, if you’re lucky, you might not recall it at all.
6. Forbidden entry
Undercover investigators said they got past U.S. border agents with fake IDs. Their report concluded that illegals are in great danger of going clubbing with Lindsay Lohan.
7. Striking
The lead singer of Five For Fighting could totally play Hyde in the “That ’70s Show” movie.
8. To the mat
In a new magazine interview, a former high school wrestler who wrestled Tom Cruise said Cruise’s specialty was a move called the “High Crotch.” I suddenly feel sorry for Suri’s future prom date.
9. Teen choice
Authors Stephen King and John Irving are begging J.K. Rowling not to kill off Harry Potter. I say do it now. Nobody wants to read “Harry Potter and the Quest for Acne Medication.”
———-
LEBERSOLE@TRIBUNE.COM
