The Father Factor
By Stephan B. Poulter (Prometheus, $18 paper)
Whether your father was terrific or a tyrant, affirming or absent, he psychologically has marked you for life, and that includes the way you operate in the workplace. In a thought-provoking work, psychologist Poulter looks at five fathering styles: Superachiever, Time Bomb, Passive, Absent and Compassionate Mentor. His tips help you identify the traits your father’s style has produced in you, overcome the scars and even benefit from your past.
1. Shame and self-doubt are two lingering side effects of poor fathering.
2. A passive dad: “My father always came home from work and went directly to the living room couch. He spent the entire evening there, reading the newspaper and watching TV.”
3. Even if your father did a poor job, it doesn’t doom you to a stunted adulthood.
4. “Always remember the old Chinese proverb that says that, if you are going to resent someone, you’d better dig two graves–one for the person you resent and the other one for you.”
5. Being a compassionate mentor at work can have a huge impact not just on you but also on those around you.
