This town’s all giddy because the Bears are getting an extra night game. We’re big time, folks. Act like you’ve been there before (even if it’s been 20 years).
Globe-trodden
The NFL will play two regular-season games a year overseas, starting in ’07. Good luck getting back in the country, Arizona Cardinals.
Illegal alien
Some possible sites include Mexico, Canada, England and Germany. But the league already locked in The Smudge as the official foreign substance.
The run around
That injured runner didn’t blame the marathon for his fall, saying there “was nothing wrong with the ground.” Dennis Green angrily said he “let ’em off the hook!”
Cub med
Blackhawks are going down like flies. You’d think those workouts with Mark Prior would have helped.
End of an era
Toyota is horning in on NASCAR. Sayonara, good ol’ boys.
Whatcha gonna do?
Part-time deputy Shaq participated in a botched Virginia raid, though he denies it. No joke here–just too surreal.
Forked tongue
“I earned my way. I wasn’t given a silver spoon,” men’s PBA bowler Kelly Kulick said about Michelle Wie. I’m sure Michelle wasn’t expecting that knife in her back either.
Baseball, baby
They call it a labor deal because getting owners and players to agree is like giving birth.
FIVE THINGS …
Duties for Deputy Shaq
– Bring in steals leader for questioning.
– Fashion police: Ben Wallace prime suspect.
– Remake “Miami Vice.”
– Foot patrol. Biiiiig foot patrol.
– Every third Saturday, arrest Kobe.
———-
REDEYESPORTS@TRIBUNE.COM
