After you were down a goal
in the third period, Denis Savard,
I was all ready for an Idiot Savard
joke. Then you go and pull out the rally. Darn.
2. A win’s a win, but …
It would have been even better if you had worn a headband.
3. Death sentence
The BCS said it won’t block a Notre Dame rematch with Michigan. I thought this country had laws against double jeopardy.
4. Woof and woof
The Wolves beat the Iowa Stars 5-2. I promised Skates the mascot that if they won, I’d bark like a dog. He’s not very bright.
5. Oh, baby
Albert Pujols believes the MVP award should have gone to a playoff-team member. Said another way: “Waaaaah!”
6. Trophy knives
I want a rule that the MVP can’t go to a Cardinal. Or a Tiger.
7. Grrrrr!
Serena said a “Battle of the Sexes” promoter harassed her. Like you could get close to a Williams sister (without raw meat).
8. Lady killers
The DePaul women beat Wisconsin-Green Bay 71-70. Whatever you do, Chicago, DO NOT RIOT!
9. Who’d know?
Who’d care?
All of these NFL players are going at each other lately. All I want to know is, can I sneak in a slap on T.O.?
FIVE THINGS …
… ways Denis Savard will celebrate his debut victory:
– Ice cream all around! (So cliche).
– Bill Wirtz, spring for a Tic-Tac. Now use it.
– Orders strippers, but has them add layers.
– Forgets Zamboni, uses his bare bottom.
– Make your own puck joke, I’m out.
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redeyesports@tribune.com
