If you’re thinking one of these panelists probably should be benched, we say take it easy on the little guy. Chicagosports.com’s Rahula Strohl is doing his best.
TODAY’S QUESTIONS
TOPIC 1: WHAT CAN BRIAN GRIESE DO THAT REX GROSSMAN CAN’T?
Jimmy Greenfield: Complain that his college team got screwed over by the BCS.
Leo Ebersole: A killer magic trick: He turns into the most popular QB in Chicago without starting a game.
Phillip Thompson: Lose the job to Orton, who’ll lose it to Rex, creating an anomaly where they all play at the same time.
Rahula Strohl: Lose his job to Jay Fiedler.
Stick Figure: I don’t know who any of these people are.
TOPIC 2: WHY DIDN’T MICHIGAN GET A SECOND CHANCE AT THE NATIONAL TITLE?
Jimmy Greenfield: Because. They. Had. Their. Chance. Get. Over. It.
Leo Ebersole: “Second chance?” I’d like to think of it as more of a stay of execution.
Phillip Thompson: Maybe their fans are too obnoxious. Nah, can’t be that or Florida wouldn’t be playing.
Rahula Strohl: ‘Cause Brian Griese wasn’t their quarterback.
I believe in second chances. I also believe I can fly.
TOPIC 3: WHO WILL BE THE NEXT PRO ATHLETE TO GET ENGAGED, AND TO WHOM?
Jimmy Greenfield: Corey Patterson to Rex Grossman. They have so much in common.
Leo Ebersole: Alfonso Soriano. To Jimmy Greenfield. … In Jimmy Greenfield’s mind.
Phillip Thompson: Lance Armstrong will put his past with Sheryl Crow behind him and try with Russell Crowe.
No pro athlete will ever get engaged again. Drunken Vegas weddings for all.
Stick Figure: I don’t answer questions about hanky-panky. You’re a naughty neighbor!
TOPIC 4: PICK A HOLIDAY THEME TO DESCRIBE THE BULLS’ SEASON SO FAR.
Jimmy Greenfield: “Crazy uncle comes for a visit.” (The Ben Wallace story)
Leo Ebersole: “Chestnuts roasting on Scott Skiles’ head.”
Phillip Thompson: “It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Lottery Picks.”
Rahula Strohl: ‘Tis the season to forgive and forget the Circus Trip.
Stick Figure: “You’re jingling, baby. Go ahead, baby.”
TOPIC 5: WITHOUT LOOKING IT UP, HOW MANY CINCINNATI BENGALS HAVE BEEN ARRESTED THIS YEAR?
Jimmy Greenfield: 47. Keep in mind the year’s not over and I can see the future.
Leo Ebersole: Enough that “America’s Most Wanted” now broadcasts from the stadium press box.
Phillip Thompson: With one more, they clinch home cell advantage in the next prison riot.
Rahula Strohl: No matter how many, they can never catch the Portland Trail Blazers.
Stick Figure: My watch says it’s Christmas time! Hee hee! I really don’t have a watch.
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