Christmas ended yesterday, Hanukkah last Friday. The holidays are over. No more gifts to unwrap, carols to sing or candles to light.
The end of the holiday season can be disappointing for kids — even if the holidays weren’t very merry.
“I think Christmas is such a magical time for kids. You build it up,” says author Sondra Clark, 17, of Nashville. “Sometimes there is a letdown if you didn’t get the gifts you wanted or you didn’t have a good experience.”
Part of the build-up comes from “an undercurrent of competition” kids have with one another at school, Clark says. Last year, one of her classmates received a car for Christmas. Clark received a necklace.
Whether it’s because of presents or personal problems, some kids won’t return to school with stories of a happy holiday. But there are ways to deal, even if you’re not feeling too merry. Read on:
You didn’t get what you wanted
Not getting the video game or cell phone you wanted is a common kid complaint.
“We live in a very consumer-oriented culture,” says Peter Kane, aprofessor of psychiatry and behavioral sciences at Northwestern University. “There is a big emphasis, especially for kids, on ‘What am I going to get?’ “
Kids should remember a wish list is just that — a list of wishes, not guarantees. Kane also recommends trying to appreciate the presents you did receive and not focusing on the ones you wish you had gotten.
A bit of perspective also may help. “There are kids who don’t receive anything,” says Clark, author of the upcoming positive-thinking book for kids, “Snap to it!” (Sourcebooks, Spring 2007).
Money was tight and the present scene was weak
Talk to Mom or Dad to better understand why the holidays weren’t the same this year. Learning more about a situation helps kids feel more in control, Kane says.
Kids also can connect by asking their parents about their own Christmas disappointments. Kane says parents may have ideas on how to turn holiday letdowns into positive experiences.
It may help to separate your feelings about presents from your feelings about the holidays. Anna Rose F., 16, of Chicago loves the holidays and says presents are just one part.
“I love it all: I love seeing other people be happy about the holidays, doing traditions and having different rituals. I love the spirit of Christmas,” Anna Rose says.
The spirit of the holidays also includes music, lights and family dinners. So if there aren’t many presents under the tree, Anna Rose says kids shouldn’t consider the holidayruined.
Things were different this year
Death or divorce can change the way families celebrate the holidays. Even though kids may not want to spend time with their parents, Kane says family time can be helpful for kids.
Staying active also can help kids not dwell on the disappointing holiday. Kane recommends finding an activity that has meaning to you. Try to be creative so you feel like you accomplished something meaningful.
“The more people tend to dwell on the negative things, the more those things tend to be all they see,” Kane says.
Instead of concentrating on what they didn’t like, Clark says kids could use their time off to try something new. “Try a new hobby, go ice skating if you’ve never done that before. Take a class, like guitar,” Clark says. “If you’re always into sports, go to a theater production. Broaden your horizons.”
You already miss the holidays
There is a lot excitement around the holidays, and Kane says it’s not uncommon for kids to feel overwhelmed. School is out, family may be visiting and there are back-to-back parties.
Kids can avoid the post-party blahs by being active and playing with their new presents. “Enjoy the things you got; have fun with them. The fun extends beyond the opening,” Kane says.
The fun reaches all the way to New Year’s for Anna Rose. Her family hosts a back-yard bonfire a few days after Christmas.
“It’s a lot of family and friends, and we talk about how it was over the holidays,” she says.
And because the holidays come once a year, Anna Rose says she doesn’t “think it’s worth getting disappointed about.” “Christmas is going to come again, and the other holidays are going to come again,” she says.
The post-holiday disappointments should fade within a day or two.
And Kane promises no kid’s life will be ruined by not receiving a cell phone or an iPod as a gift. It might seem like a major letdown, but Kane says that in a few years, it will only feel like an annoyance.
“These are the daily ups and downs we all have to deal with,” he says.
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The season is not over yet at these children’s museums
You can extend the season by visiting one of the Chicago-area children’s museums and taking part in holiday activities that continue into January. But just about any of the exhibits and activities can help you beat the post-holiday blahs.
– The holidays aren’t over as long as there’s gingerbread. Through Jan. 7, head to the Chicago Children’s Museum for its Annual Gingerbread Workshop, where you can craft sweet-smelling gingerbread sculptures and “make and bake” wooden gingerbread cookies. There’s also an “ice rink” where you can skate in your socks. Daily at 11:30, the museum also holds a workshop where kids can make cool crafts from old holiday cards. Admission: $8. Chicago Children’s Museum, 700 E. Grand Ave. at Navy Pier; ChiChildrensMuseum.org or 312-527-1000.
– Keep the season bright at the Wonder Works New Year’s Eve Party and learn how other countries ring in the New Year. The party is during the day, so kids will celebrate another country’s midnight, such as that of Greece or Spain. Sunday from 12 to 5 p.m.; party free with $5 admission. Wonder Works, 6445 W. North Ave., Oak Park; Wonder-Works.org or 708-383-4815.
– Make a Winter Snow Collage at Kohl Children’s Museum. From Jan. 2 to Jan. 14, make this art project, which exercises math and thinking skills as kids use different shades of white to create the collage. Admission: $6.50. Kohl Children’s Museum, 2100 Patriot Boulevard, Glenview; KohlChildrensMuseum.org or 847-832-6600.
