Jimmy Greenfield got to go down to Miami and the rest of the guys can’t wait to “welcome” him back. Bag Boy, in fact, will be waiting for him at the airport.
TODAY’S QUESTIONS
TOPIC 1: THE ART INSTITUTE LIONS GET BEARS HELMETS. PUT ANOTHER PIECE OF EQUIPMENT ON A CHICAGO ICON.
Jimmy Greenfield: I’d put handcuffs on the City Council.
Phillip Thompson: You can put shoulder pads on the Picasso horse if you can figure out where the shoulders are.
Leo Ebersole: Nothing says “team pride” like a jockstrap from each antenna on the Hancock building.
Brian Moore: A muzzle for Mike Ditka. The less he says, the better.
Bag Boy: Jimmy’s a Chicago icon (OK, not really), how ’bout some jock itch for him?
TOPIC 2: WHICH BEAR WILL WE BE SICK OF HEARING ABOUT BY WEEK’S END?
Jimmy Greenfield: As a whole, the 1985 Bears.
Phillip Thompson: Just say no to interviews. Now. It’s not your time.
Leo Ebersole: Robbie Gould will be healing lepers in Calcutta by the time the media’s done with him.
Rex Grossman. Runner-up:
Rex Grossman’s “mind-set.”
Brian Moore: Brian Urlacher, for sure. But don’t tell him I said that, please.
Bag Boy: I don’t understand the question. You mean the Baylor Bears?
TOPIC 3: IF YOU HAD TWO TICKETS TO THE SUPER BOWL, WOULD YOU HAVE GIVEN ONE TO SARAH SPAIN?
Jimmy Greenfield: I just asked my wife. Her answer: No. No, I would not.
Phillip Thompson: I wouldn’t give one to the King of Spain. eBay, son, eBay!
Leo Ebersole: I’d make a statement and give it to the elderly or the needy. Nah, just kidding. I’d invite her.
Brian Moore: No way, but I’d have no trouble putting one on eBay. What’s wrong? I’ve got kids to feed!
I wouldn’t even take Bag Girl.
Bag Boy: It’s the Bears! I’d figure out a way to go twice.
TOPIC 4: WHAT MOVIE OR SONG DESCRIBES YOUR IMPRESSION OF COLTS FANS?
Jimmy Greenfield: “Ordinary People.”
Phillip Thompson: “Stranger than Fiction.”
Leo Ebersole: “Vanilla Sky.”
Brian Moore: “Highway to Hell”–it’s where the Bears will send them and also what driving I-65 feels like.
Bag Boy: “Who Let The Dogs Out?”
TOPIC 5: WITH THE BULLS BEATING MIAMI, IS THAT A GOOD SIGN OR A BAD SIGN FOR THE BEARS?
Jimmy Greenfield: It’s a great sign. And if Lovie could convince Dungy to start Shaq …
When I think of one for the men, I’ll let you know.
Leo Ebersole: It’s a sign the Bears need to knock out Peyton Manning if they’re going to win.
Phillip Thompson: Unless Urlacher can grow a Ben Wallace-sized afro between now and Sunday, it’s irrelevant.
Brian Moore: Whenever the Miami Heat lose, it’s good for all of mankind.
Bag Boy: Are there EVER any good signs in Chicago? You sicken me, question man.
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