The television huddles in its hideaway; ashamed, ignored, ignominious. Not that we’re above TV. We just can’t find it.
Which inspired us, one weekend, to move it. All it took was some heavy lifting and rewiring and redecorating and suddenly we had television right in the room where we live, the living room.
Once we added a few accoutrements like a couch and a pillow and a snack, staring listlessly seemed downright fun. Who knew?
Television has gotten smarter since “Get Smart.” For instance, the movie fan no longer need hire a sitter and stand in line and get, well, dressed. She can stay home and watch, right in the living room. Apparently everyone already knows this. Nor does she need to first fetch from the movie store. Now the movie store sends the movie scampering right to the mailbox. Everyone knows this too. In fact, she can simply slouch in front of the screen and say something demanding, like “I demand a movie,” and for mere money it shows you one.
Imagine.
Rumor has it television can also be coaxed into impersonating the stereo or computer. A pleasure reserved for technician who has progressed past uniting plug with socket. After we found the television and the remote and the couch and the gumption to start demanding movies, it was like moving into the Music Box Theatre. We spooled through the classics including “Singing in the Rain” which, shockingly, features no singing in the rain. Or perhaps I was focusing on a closeup of the pillow. The local dad expanded young horizons with “Wayne’s World,” which the manners specialist in the family didn’t appreciate.
Eventually everyone got hungry, and I was surprised to find that the kitchen is very close to the television, once the television settles into a room close to the kitchen. I tried to come up with a dish that would look at home when spilled on the furniture, most of which is, inexplicably, orange.
Then I remembered that television is fat with food shows. I flipped past that peppy one and the loud one and scientific one. But gave up when I couldn’t find the remote button marked “taste.”
I opted for the classic: popcorn. Easy to maneuver hand-to-mouth while distracted. Crisp enough to retrieve from the orange cushion crevice. Not my favorite way to enjoy a meal. But novel. Just like television.
HOT POP
Makes one medium bowl
2 tablespoons canola or corn oil
1/2 cup popcorn kernels
2 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted
1 teaspoon sugar
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/8 teaspoon ground red pepper
1. Pop: Heat oil and one kernel of popcorn in a large heavy pot, uncovered, over medium-high heat. When the kernel pops, add the rest of the popcorn, swirling to coat with oil. Cover (leave just a slim crack for steam to escape). Continue popping, shaking pan frequently, until popping stops, 4 minutes. Carefully remove lid (avoiding steam and the errant flying popcorn); tumble popcorn into a big bowl.
2. Season: Drizzle on butter, mix thoroughly. Add sugar, salt and red pepper. Mix thoroughly.
3. Crisp: If popcorn isn’t as crispy as you’d like, scatter it onto a rimmed baking sheet and slide into a 300-degree oven for 5 minutes. Serve hot with a new release.
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LeahREskin@aol.com
