“Some people are surprised I don’t get mugged every other day,” said Adam Selzer, tour guide for Weird Chicago tours. “People from small towns assume there is a gangbanger on every corner and are surprised I can walk back to my apartment without getting caught in the crossfire of a drive-by.”
Out-of-towners can be so naive. But Chicago’s tour guides say they love them all the same. Good thing, too, since Chicago has a $10 billion tourism industry that has steadily risen since 2002, a spokeswoman for the Chicago Convention and Tourism Bureau said.
With tourists hitting the Chicago pavement in full force this summer, RedEye talked with the tour guides who will lead them around the city.
While most tourists are perfectly pleasant, guides are privy to all sorts of oddball occurrences and random misconceptions and their tales range from the bizarre to the downright disturbing.
“[I’ve heard that] on the anniversary of Oscar Mayer’s death a bunch of Wienermobiles descend on Rosehill Cemetery and have a wienie roast at his grave,” said Selzer, retelling a popular urban legend.
He can neither confirm nor deny the roasting of any wienies.
Ken Berg, another of Weird Chicago’s guides, recalled an incident while touring “Death Alley,” where, in 1903, hundreds of people died trying to escape a fire at the Iroquois Theatre.
“One time a homeless woman dropped her trousers and started peeing in front of a group of 5th graders,” Berg said.
At least those 5th graders were spared the smelly fate of tourgoers who were drenched in “brownish-yellow” liquid when their sightseeing boat traveled under a bridge on the Chicago River at the same time the Dave Matthews Band’s bus emptied out its septic tank — perhaps the ultimate horror story in recent Chicago lore.
But not everything in a tour guide’s daily exploits involves wieners and bodily fluids.
James Borkman, a volunteer for the Chicago Greeter service — which leads free group tours — said one of his most memorable experiences was with an international visitor who just couldn’t leave the city without making a splash.
“I had a gentlemen from Singapore who insisted on crossing the Buckingham Fountain fence because he wanted a picture of himself actually in the fountain,” Borkman said.
A law against criminal trespassing couldn’t stop the man from getting his picture. Nor could Borkman, a law student, ironically enough.
The job is never dull, the tour guides RedEye interviewed said. “I think I’m going to get sick of it, but it’s always different,” said Karen Becker, another Chicago Greeter. “With different people you get different questions, and I never get into this mantra of repeating the same thing.”
Sometimes they learn a thing or two on the job.
As a group, the guides in the Greeter service can speak 16 different languages to accommodate international visitors. Vishu Ramanathan speaks some French and said he enjoys the opportunity to practice with people he leads around town.
“I learned all of my French hanging out with my friends at college, so when I started giving [French speakers] a tour, I realized my drinking-beer-and-playing-darts French wasn’t the kind that could show them the Loop,” Ramanathan said. “Fortunately they were middle school teachers who could [teach] me.”
Guides said the biggest draw to the job is the city itself.
“I have the Second City chip on my shoulder, and New York is a singular place that has nothing to do with America,” Ramanathan said. “Chicago is really America’s city, and visitors are impressed by how kick-ass our little town is.”
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rasher@tribune.com
