1. Draggin’ tales
Years from now, we’ll look back on the R. Kelly trial and wonder what the fuss was about. Then we’ll be reminded when lawyers make opening arguments the next day.
2. In a little while
Things we’re still waiting for: world peace, someone from “Friends” to do something with his or her life, the R. Kelly trial, Bill O’Reilly’s spontaneous combustion, the Red Line …
3. We have a problem
Chicago is not among Forbes magazine’s top 10 rental markets in the country. It should be noted that the area’s cockroaches respectfully disagree.
4. And/or
It’s unclear whether M.I.A.’s shoes vomited upward or her shirt vomited downward.
5. Long way to go
A 9-year-old university student in Hong Kong told reporters college was “very easy.” Don’t brag until you finish your first case race, kid.
6. Uh, yeah
A new study says rock stars are more likely to die prematurely than the average person. Huh. I’d think access to sudden and extreme wealth, hard-core drugs and Lamborghinis would have a calming effect.
7. Sit tight
“Nip/Tuck” starts its new season Oct. 30, zap2it.com reports. If that sounds like a long wait, there’ll be plenty of freakish plastic surgery on display at the Emmys this month.
8. Nice try
Whoopi Goldberg stood up for Michael Vick during her first day on “The View.” Listen, Whoopi, we appreciate the attempt to make Elisabeth Hasselbeck look popular, but …
9. No dice
Jerry Lewis apologized for using an anti-gay slur during his annual telethon. If the prospect of seeing him make out on screen didn’t already kill his shot at being on “Grey’s Anatomy,” that would’ve done it.
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LEBERSOLE@TRIBUNE.COM
