We interrupt our normally scheduled griping this week for even more griping.
The Cubs. In case no one has told you guys, let me remind you ever so gently.
The Brewers are handing this thing to you. As Alec Baldwin said in “Glengarry Glenross,” “Are you man enough to take it?”
I don’t think so. There’s about 18 games left. This is how it’s done, Cubs: Your big bats, the ones you’re paying all the big bucks to (that’s you, Derek Lee and Aramis Ramirez), should start doing the things they’re paid to do. As it is, no one on this team is going to finish with 100 RBIs. No one. That’s pathetic. Remember that if we don’t win this thing.
Other than four games left with the Cardinals, we’ve got cupcakes the rest of the way. Beat them and it’s yours.
Now for the other knuckleheads. Someone please explain to me why we had to sign Ozzie Guillen all the way through 2012.
That’s like, 10 years from now. That’s not bad for a year and a half of absolutely pitiful baseball.
Also, all of our so-called prospects stink, except for Josh Fields. Jerry Owens, Danny whoever, Ryan bla-bla, Brian nobody, and all the rest of the JV kids should just settle down in good old Charlotte. None of them belong here.
Which brings us to Kenny Williams. Sir, I’m not sure what your plan is, but you’d better scrap it. Do us a favor and blow this thing up. Just start over — and with other teams’ prospects — because ours don’t work.
Remember, if you fail, we’ll extend your contract too. Pressure’s on. Ah, who are we kidding? Looks like we’re stuck with you and Ozzie forever.
Good copy. Bad baseball. Love it.
What I don’t love is bad football — bad offensive football. When the Bears play the Chiefs, we’ll be looking at two teams that didn’t score a touchdown last week
Also, according to Ron Rivera, Rex Grossman is a “mental midget.” Further, Chargers linebacker Shaun Phillips said Bears running back Cedric Enis (yeah, I mean “Enis”) was “soft.”
I’d love to argue, but they’re correct. Cedric Benson can’t hang onto the ball, and can’t make tough yards. Rex … well, you know.
So let’s stick it to the only team with a more putrid offense than ours. I’ll be taking Bag Girl to this one, so a win gives us, you know, something to talk about … nicely.
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redeyesports@tribune.com
