The Evil Super Computer returns! Oh, yeah, and chicagosports.com’s Adam Caldarelli.
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Jimmy Greenfield
Phillip Thompson
Leo Ebersole
Adam Caldarelli
EvilSuperComputer
TOPIC 1: TANK JOHNSON IS TO THE DALLAS COWBOYS AS …
… O.J. is to armed robbery.
… goons are to Tony Soprano’s outfit.
… my regurgitated lunch is to this question.
I don’t remember this one from my Stanley Kaplan SAT class.
… computer viruses are to my mainfransrp34awerf%$#.
TOPIC 2: WHOSE PERFORMANCE WILL MAKE OR BREAK THE CUBS?
Nobody’s. They’ll choke the
division away as a team.
Ryan Theriot’s. He needs to be aggressive stealing second, so he can be stranded by D-Lee.
It’s all on the bullpen now. Sox fans have to be pleased with that.
The Milwaukee Brewers’.
I already know who wins. Declare me king of Wrigleyville and I might let you know.
TOPIC 3: WHAT DO YOU THINK OF CHICAGO’S NEW OLYMPIC LOGO?
It’s like a high uniform number during Spring Training. Gone before you know it.
I think the IOC would’ve let us keep the first one. We’re Chicago — they were expecting a bribe.
I like the throwing star. Is there a tasteful way to get a ninja in there too?
I would’ve preferred a silhouette of an Italian beef.
It’s nice, but it needs about 8 inches of snow.
TOPIC 4: IF DALE JR. WILL DRIVE THE NO. 88 MOUNTAIN DEW CAR, WHAT WILL YOU DRIVE?
Either the Corolla or the
Lamborghini.
The Double-0 7-Up car.
A Joe Gibbs Racing car. That way I’m guaranteed a win against the Dolphins.
The No. 87 Capri Sun golf cart.
I AM my own ride. Evil Super Computer … TRANSFORM!
TOPIC 5: O.J. SIMPSON’S OUT ON BAIL. WHAT DOES HE DO NEXT?
Become Kato Kaelin’s houseguest.
Research the 756th home-run ball and help Barry Bonds organize a “sting.”
Record the hit single “Think You Can Steal My [Bleep]?”
I don’t know, kill someone?
Kill time … AND ANYTHING ELSE THAT GETS NEAR HIM.
