Kobe Bryant, the Lakers star many Bulls fans coveted earlier this year, visited the United Center for the first time this season. RedEye rounded up some of its regulars to watch the first half of Tuesday night’s game. Let’s see what Tracy Swartz, Leo Ebersole, Phil Thompson, chicagosports.com’s Rahula Strohl and Bag Boy had to say — or text — in their Bulls Chat Room.
Bulls vs l.a. lakers let’s chat a minute
Phil: We have tipoff!
Leo: A Kobe alley-oop for the first basket. Two words: Poetic. OK, one word.
Rahula: Joe Smith almost got rim. Meanwhile, Kobe got about 10 feet above it.
Bag Boy: Joe Smith’s our 1st option on offense? Sick.
Rahula: Wayne Larrivee “tough shot” count: 2, and both were the Bulls.
Tracy: When do the Bulls arrive?
Bag Boy: Prediction: Kobe scores 112% of his team’s points tonight.
Rahula: For those who haven’t watched a lot of Wayne Larrivee, “tough shot” means “why in the name of Jordan did you take that shot?”
Phil: Hey, there’s Col. Sanders, I mean Phil Jackson …
Bag Boy: 85 years young. He actually passed Tex Winter in age.
Rahula: Mark Grace in the house! Trixies everywhere faint.
Tracy: Leo didn’t faint!
Phil: Listen to the boos for Kobe! Really warms the heart at Xmas time.
Tracy: It’s only ’cause the girl fans want to give him a free throw.
Phil: Weren’t these same folks chanting his name not too long ago?
Rahula: No, the Kobe haters bought up the tix for this game before the trade rumors started.
Rahula: I haven’t seen a JoNo cutaway. Is he wearing seersucker warmups on the bench?
Tracy: He’s always warmed up.
Bag Boy: Look at the colleges represented on the Bulls — Duke, Kansas, LSU, Florida — why do we suck?
Leo: It’s mostly the Duke part.
Leo: And the Kansas part.
Phil: College doesn’t guarantee performance. Exhibit A: Tracy went to Florida.
Rahula: I was gonna say it was the lack of North Carolina and Central Arkansas players.
Tracy: I bet Phil Jackson has a billy goatee curse.
Bag Boy: Soul Patch, Tracy. Jeannie likes it. Don’t know what that means.
Rahula: I’m made from bits of real panther, so you know I’m good.
Tracy: It means: “Ow, that itches. But you’re rich so I’ll turn the other cheek.”
Phil: Jackson doesn’t care what Jeannie likes. He’s just interested in her Buss.
Tracy: The president?
Bag Boy: They were never the same after he asked her to sign his “Playboy” with her pictorial.
Leo: Speaking of presidents, I believe Woodrow Wilson was in office when Derek Fisher was a rookie.
Tracy: Ha ha … Woodrow.
Rahula: Wasn’t he on those Lakers teams that three-peated? Not the L.A. teams, the Minneapolis ones.
Rahula: Aaron Gray lost his shoe and just stood there for about 10 seconds trying to put it back on. No one noticed a difference.
Bag Boy: No offense, but when the Bulls go down by six, it’s really hard for them to come back. This one’s over.
Bag Boy: I guess “no offense” can be taken literally, or figuratively. You guys sort it out.
Rahula: 24 hours ago, I was sitting where I am now, watching the Bears. Dear Ganesha, what have I done to displease you?
Rahula: That’s three blocks for Tyrus. He’s just trying to make Tracy sad by taking away JoNo’s playing time.
Tracy: I was promised Jo! Where is he??? Jo, if you’re reading this, please e-mail me at tswartz@tribune.com so we can practice your full court press.
Rahula: Score: 21-15 Lakers. Rebound score: 20-14 Lakers. That, my friends, is lousy shooting.
Bag Boy: Here’s Wikipedia on Ganesha: Ganesha is widely revered as the Remover of Obstacles and more generally as Lord of Beginnings and Lord of Obstacles.
Leo: Wait a minute — Kobe didn’t take the last shot at the end of the first quarter? Twenty bucks says one of the other Lakers is found in a dumpster after the game.
Bag Boy: Why would anyone pray to the lord of obstacles? Find another diety, man.
Tracy: Leo’s the lord of the fries.
Rahula: So you’re saying you didn’t watch the Bears last night.
Bag Boy: Oh, gosh. That was the modern definition of pain. I would have rather gone on a date with Sandra Bernhardt.
Rahula: I resent that. She was very nice to me and she paid for her half of the meal. (i.e., the No. 2 with a root beer).
Tracy: Ha ha … No. 2.
Rahula: Wow, Tracy has made a Woodrow joke and a poop joke tonight. How is it you’re single?
Rahula: Kirk Hinrich just passed to the other team. That 847 number calling your cell is Jerry Angelo, Kirk.
Bag Boy: True story: I was at a Red Wings game in Detroit on Saturday night, and Chris Chelios (remember him? You probably don’t, Tracy, because he’s 65 years old) scored a goal for the other team!
Tracy: Walton is kind of hot.
Rahula: In that Bullwinkle the Moose kind of way.
Phil: Isn’t it sad that Nocioni distributes the ball better than Hinrich or Gordon?
Rahula: Chicago is the birthplace of the point forward, Phil, didn’t you know that?
Tracy: Is this a Jo-ke?? No Noah???
Rahula: He’s having a bad hair day.
Tracy: Kobe being “24” is fitting. He’s like the Jack Bauer of basketball.
Rahula: Luke Walton just laid the ball in. His father is currently hurling objects at his television, screaming, “THROW IT DOWN, BIG MAN!”
Tracy: I haven’t heard that since Saturday night.
Phil: L.A. 49, Bulls 45. Yep, it’s like a preview of the NBA Finals.
Bag Boy: There’s only two things you can count on happening practically every day. The Bulls being down at halftime and Pamela Anderson filing for divorce.
Tracy: Final words: Jo Brother, Where Art Thou? ‘Til we “meet” again.
