It’s the big college basketball showdown between Indiana and Illinois this weekend. We had to separate Brian and Supriya. Sign up for the fun at redeyechicago.com/fiveonfive.
TOPIC 1: IF JACKSONVILLE BEATS NEW ENGLAND IN THE NFL PLAYOFFS, I PROMISE TO …
Supriya Doshi: … stop referring to them as the Jacksonville Kitty Cats.
Phil Thompson: … never call them Hicksonville again.
Leo Ebersole: … arrive in Boston shortly after holding a banner that says “16-1.”
Brian Moore: … try very, very hard to keep interested in the other, much-crappier teams.
Tracy Swartz: … start considering Jacksonville part of Florida instead of NASCAR-celona.
TOPIC 2: WHAT WOULD YOU OFFER IN A BET AGAINST A FELLOW 5 ON 5 PANELIST ABOUT THE NFL PLAYOFFS?
Supriya Doshi: My left shoe. I lost my right one.
Phil Thompson: I have an alligator belt and a pair of gator shoes that I’m sure Tracy would pray to.
Leo Ebersole: I’m willing to put a homemade batch of sauerkraut on the line with any of you.
Brian Moore: I have a half-eaten piece of leftover pizza from New Year’s Eve … HEY! Hands off, Phil.
Tracy Swartz: My special Favre-a-que sauce. Meaty!
TOPIC 3: WHAT ONE ESSENTIAL ITEM SHOULD THE BULLS TAKE TO ATLANTA WHEN THEY FACE THE HAWKS?
Supriya Doshi: Kleenex to wipe their tears after they get their butts kicked.
Phil Thompson: Not a thing. I got no love for those peaches.
Leo Ebersole: Ear muffs. Remember, that’s Lil Jon’s base of operations.
Brian Moore: A one-way ticket to Poland.
Tracy Swartz: Riot Pepsi.
TOPIC 4: HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN THE BLACKHAWKS SELLING OUT THREE STRAIGHT GAMES RECENTLY?
Supriya Doshi: The world is ending! Or other Chicago sports are just that bad.
Phil Thompson: With the unusually warm weather, Chicagoans were looking for places to cool down.
Leo Ebersole: They’re young, they fight, and they score. Throw in some rehab and you’ve re-created “The O.C.”
Brian Moore: They suck less than the Bulls, so why not?
Tracy Swartz: I think people misunderstood the purpose of the Zamboni.
TOPIC 5: PREDICT THE TRASH TALK BETWEEN ILLINOIS AND INDIANA’S ERIC GORDON on SUNDAY.
Supriya Doshi: Forget trash talk — it’ll be trash thrown. And Illinois will win … at least the trash-throwing part.
Phil Thompson: “I bet you’re sorry you missed our 0-2 Big Ten start.” They’re not good at trash talk either.
Leo Ebersole: I can’t predict it, but if it gets too rough I guarantee Gordon will bolt for another campus.
Brian Moore: “You may be 12-1, but we went to the Rose Bowl … oh, wait …”
Tracy Swartz: I know they smell of trash and play trashketball, but can Indiana talk trash?
