For the first time since August, we are faced with a weekend with no football anywhere in sight.
If that weren’t bad enough, after the Super Bowl is over, the sports world presents an unappetizing spread to the Chicago sports fan.
The Bulls stink. The local college teams are hovering in the mediocre-to-bad range. The Blackhawks are trying to scrape their way into their first playoff berth since 2002, but we can watch only a little more than half of their games on TV.
The NCAA basketball tournament isn’t for another seven weeks, and baseball season starts two weeks after that.
So what is there left to do? Hate.
That’s right; be a hater. So with apologies to the hilarious, if extremely vulgar football blog Kissing Suzy Kolber, here is the hater’s guide to the next two or so months.
THE HATE-O-METER
4/9
The Super Bowl
New York vs. New England in a game that’s over-hyped no matter who plays in it? But it still has the commercials and the parties.
8/9
ESPN
The network that was born to over-hype anything New England and New York.
5/9
The Boston Celtics
That city is getting everything right now. The last thing they deserve is a winning NBA team. They’re 33-6, but the more they lose between now and the playoffs, the less fawning will be done.
9/9
The Detroit Pistons
The Bulls, despite being the worst shooting team in the East, are 3-0 against their division rivals. If the Bulls can’t succeed, the least the NBA Gods could offer Chicagoans is a Pistons flop.
6/9
The San Antonio Spurs
We hear endlessly about what a classy team they are. Just type “Bruce Bowen dirty” into a YouTube search. Not so classy.
2/9
Duke University basketball
Because it’s easy and popular.
