Five on Five welcomes another character. He’s snarky and pathological. He’s duplicitous and he can’t be trusted. He’s Buster Bracket and chances are you’ve already met. Sign up at redeyechicago.com/fiveonfive.
Buster Bracket
Brian Moore
Scott Kleinberg
Phillip Thompson
Jimmy Greenfield
TOPIC 1: HOW IS YOUR BRACKET?
Oh, heh, heh. Just as I planned it. Anarchy in the streets!
How dare you?
Ugh. It looks like Phil’s bracket before the first game — hopeless. Can I get a high-five, Buster?
Ugh, it looks like Scott. Period.
Oh, I’m in great shape. Still, I probably shouldn’t have picked DePaul to win it all.
TOPIC 2: WHAT WILL THE NEXT BIG NCAA TOURNAMENT UPSET BE?
I’ve heard something about North Carolina, but I’m not telling you.
Michigan State over Memphis. Book it.
Shocking, but I think Villanova, which I was starting to like for the Final Four.
Wisconsin is overdue. The Big Ten Effect has to kick in some time.
Davidson over Wisconsin. Count on it.
TOPIC 3: IF THE CUBS STARTED THE SEASON TODAY …
… they’d make the Final Four. The best Final Four? You figure it out.
… they would have to call on a bleacher bum to fill out the roster.
… 35,000 people would watch them go 0-1.
… at Jason Marquis’ salary, those extra games would put him in another tax bracket.
… Sam Zell would be their best closer.
TOPIC 4: IF THE WHITE SOX STARTED THE SEASON TODAY …
… no one would notice. It’s March Madness, not Sox Madness.
… they would have a head start on Detroit. They’re gonna need it.
… 35,000 people would watch them go 0-1 on the South Side.
… no one would have enough delegates to win the nomination at third base.
… intensity would be lacking, and it would be Ozzie’s fault. He’s gotta go.
TOPIC 5: WR BRANDON MARSHALL SLIPPED ON A MCDONALD’S WRAPPER AND PUT HIS ARM THROUGH A TV. DISCUSS.
I heard he really punched his
TV after he lost Duke and Georgetown from his bracket.
He still could be the Bears’ best receiver — as is.
And that was before he started having fun.
I would if I could just stop laughing.
Thus virtually assuring he’ll get cut twice this year.
