1. The greatest generation
When scientists excavated ancient Greece, they found great monuments to the gods. When future generations discover us, they’ll find a fossilized bag of chips and a half-finished blog post about Heidi Montag’s Kentucky Derby hat. We’ve come a long way, baby.
2. To the future
But I envision an America whose people can come together as one, despite MTV’s decision to renew “The Hills” for a fourth season. (Yes we can! Yes we can!)
3. All relative
Asked about photos of himself and Jennifer Aniston, John Mayer said “there are much worse problems in the world,” referring specifically to his music and his haircut.
4. By design
Model Karolina Kurkova (right) simply dazzles in this spray-painted garbage bag.
5. Cash money
Disney reported strong profit growth in the second quarter. As a result the company now will let Miley Cyrus pose naked up to four times a year.
6. Elite company
A Long Island group reportedly has named Dina Lohan a “top mom.” Who else is parenting on Long Island these days, Joe Simpson and Mrs. Carrot Top?
7. Circle of trust
I think we can all agree it was great to see summertime weather Tuesday in the city. Who knew we’d be so happy to welcome sweat stains back into our lives?
8. Don’t forget the lyrics
Jason Castro made history on “American Idol” on Tuesday. He’s the first person to make even Paula Abdul feel shame. Is it fair to call a musical performance hari-karaoke?
9. Below par
The theme of last night’s show was songs from Rock and Roll Hall of Famers. Notably absent from the program: New Kids on the Block.
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LEBERSOLE@TRIBUNE.COM
