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Jimmy Greenfield
Phillip Thompson
Leo Ebersole
Tracy Swartz
Rahula Strohi
TOPIC 1: WHAT DOES OZZIE GUILLEN MEAN WHEN HE SAYS ‘I EXPECT MOVEMENT TUESDAY’?
He’s telling Kenny Williams he should be on “So You Think You Can Generally Manage.”
Can’t be hitting — the Sox don’t have any. Maybe his “Darrin’s Dance Grooves 2” DVD comes in.
He means Monday was California Prunes Day.
Ozzie typically has a bowel, err, foul mouth.
The laxatives are finally gonna kick in.
TOPIC 2: HOW IS THE NEW LAKERS-CELTICS FINALS DIFFERENT THAN THE OLD LAKERS-CELtICS FINALS?
In the old one we wondered if refs were corrupt. Now we know they are.
Those were days of McHale; these are the days of inhale. Right, Jo Noah?
This time around only three Laker Girls are sacrificed to Jack Nicholson after each loss.
New, stricter laws give the Lakers court advantage. Thanks, Kobe!
Far fewer Caucasians.
TOPIC 3: WHAT IN SPORTS WORRIES YOU?
Whether today’s athletes can afford to feed their entourages.
My fantasy baseball team’s ERA, which somehow got linked with Chicago gas prices.
I’m troubled by all these photos of athletes “going to bars” and “enjoying themselves.”
Fantasy baseball. A fantasy grand slam is not a real breakfast.
The fact that “NFL Live” is still on every day on ESPN and it’s FREAKIN’ JUNE.
TOPIC 4: TO WHAT DOES BIG BROWN’S CRACKED HOOF SAGA COMPARE?
The sad saga of Mark Prior’s torn ulnar collateral hoof.
A Manolo mishap for Sarah Jessica Parker?
The John Wayne Bobbitt Reattachment Saga of 1993.
To Tatum O’Neal’s face when she got busted for cocaine. (Allegedly.)
Down there with World Series of Poker and the NBA Developmental League.
TOPIC 5: UPPER DECK MADE CARDS OF BARACK obama AND HILLARY clinton. WHAT DO THEY HAVE TO DO WITH BASEBALL?
Both of them started out the year in Iowa.
Obama’s trying to get out of Wright field, and Clinton thinks all of Bosnia is a strike zone.
Each one has pledged not to mess around with men in scoring position.
Clinton slides as Obama plays catch-her. Mitt Romney needs to get a grip.
Obama’s a Sox fan. Clinton’s a Cubs — no, Yankees — no, Nationals fan.
