1. Nice save
Verne “Mini-Me” Troyer sued TMZ to stop the release of his sex tape. In a happy coincidence, he also stopped the release of 130 gallons of vomit.
2. The full experience
What a jam-packed weekend in Chicago. Really you have no excuse for staying indoors. I mean, unless you were wearing a rainbow-colored Speedo and eating a turkey leg out of a Sox cap. Then you get a pass. Freak.
3. Dirty Jersey
HBO plans to release a 30-disc box set of “The Sopranos” Nov. 11. Bonus features include the very special documentary “The making of Adriana’s press-on nails.”
4. Tool of the devil
Brendan Fraser is handed a camera on the red carpet as a joke. But no one was laughing when, moments later, he took off in search of Dina Lohan.
5. Cash machine
“WALL-E” opened as the No. 1 movie in America over the weekend, continuing a proud tradition of money-making, dialogue-challenged robots in Hollywood that dates back to Keanu Reeves.
6. Shot down
“Wanted,” starring Angelina Jolie, finished second, sadly ruining the “No. 1 with a bullet” cliche for headline writers all over the world.
7. Old hat
The average age of people watching the five major TV networks hit 50 last year. It’s gotten so skewed that Barbara Walters recently earned the new nickname “whippersnapper.”
8. Safety dance
By now you’ve probably heard Amy Winehouse got into a fight during her latest performance. If it ever happens to you, remember to remain still. (She can’t sense motion.)
9. Consumerism
Dominos estimates that we buy 3 billion pizzas a year. The fastest-growing blood type among Americans is actually “pepperoni.”
