1. Tall order
Will Smith tells MTV he actually was offered the role of Superman a few years ago. Understandably, he turned it down. It’s a lot of pressure, after all, and unless there’s an X-ray vision scene at a Victoria’s Secret show it’s probably not worth the headache.
2. Flame off
Basic fire safety tip for the weekend: If a fire breaks out and you’re not near any water, wring out the shirt of the nearest Taste of Chicago patron.
3. Stay puffed
A new survey named Denmark the world’s happiest country. The U.S. ranked 16th. Unfortunately, we misinterpreted “Be like the Danish” as an invitation to look more like pastries.
4. He-mane
“Speed Racer” star Emile Hirsch (left) apparently doesn’t regret asking his stylist for “the Spamalot.” He’s pretty much alone on that one.
5. Deflator
In an interview Wednesday, Angelina Jolie’s obstetrician revealed … absolutely nothing about the impending birth of her twins — possibly the biggest global disappointment since Hot Pocket Calzones.
6. Sad news
How heartbreaking was it to watch Tila Tequila get rejected Tuesday? Heartbreaking in the sense that MTV is working up “A Shot at Love 3” even as you’re reading this.
7. It’s been done
Wal-Mart announced a redesigned logo that would show the company name in white letters on an orange background. Apparently the company feels the best way to distinguish its logo is to make it look as much like the Home Depot’s as possible.
8. The greatest
“He’s the most amazing person to exist.” That’s what Heidi Montag said of boyfriend Spencer Pratt. Yeah, I often find myself thinking, “If only Albert Einstein could’ve lived the life that Spencer leads.”
9. Conflicted
ZZ Top has signed a new record deal. Industry sources reveal, however, that their beards are holding out for a bigger cut of the merchandising.
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LEBERSOLE@TRIBUNE.COM
