Our weekend warriors are ready to do battle — just let them finish their pastries. Sign up at redeyechicago.com/facebookfives.
TOPIC 1. This weekend’s Sox-Rays series could be a playoff preview. Thoughts?
Phillip Thompson: I was in Tampa when they were so sure they were getting the Sox. Chicago suckers them again.
Jimmy Greenfield: That appeals to me as much as a Giuliani-Spears presidential ticket.
Tracy Swartz: The Sox will have a leg up. Tampa men are known for striking out. Repeatedly.
Leo Ebersole: As if Ozzie needed any more incentive to throw at their heads.
‘That Guy’: I’m thinking I’ll be in Wrigleyville.
TOPIC 2. College football kicks off next Thursday. Who’s poised for a breakout year?
Phillip Thompson: That Guy. He’s ready to move from Florida-State-Girl Level to Erin-Andrews Level.
Jimmy Greenfield: The Northwestern Wildcats, which should do well for an expansion team.
Tracy Swartz: Miley Cyrus. But that’s good news for That Guy. Acne is a sign of puberty.
Leo Ebersole: NU quarterback C.J. Bacher’s aerial assault will make Medal of Honor look like Tetris.
‘That Guy’: The Kappas at Indiana, The Thetas at Purdue, it’s anyone’s guess and my hookup to lose.
TOPIC 3. Pretend you’re back on campus. What would you be doing right now?
Phillip Thompson: Trying to open a locker from the inside. The saddest part: We didn’t have lockers in college.
Jimmy Greenfield: Holding Tracy’s hair back while she throws up and telling Phil it’s bad form to take photos.
Tracy Swartz: What I’m doing right now. Trying to remember if I’m on campus.
Leo Ebersole: Studying. Why lie to myself at this point?
‘That Guy’: Too easy.
TOPIC 4. ’90s rockers The Verve are releasing a reunion album. Who in the sports world should reunite?
Phillip Thompson: Chad Johnson and common sense.
Jimmy Greenfield: Jerry Angelo and the unemployment line.
Tracy Swartz: Charlie Weis with a cheeseburger. Let’s get that team a new heart.
Leo Ebersole: It’s high time we saw Jose Canseco and Mark McGwire hit the horse racing circuit.
‘That Guy’: As in the musical wizards behind “The Freshman,” an anchor in my most reliable makeout mix?
TOPIC 5. What’s one lesson you learned from the Olympics?
Phillip Thompson: Filing gymnastic deductions does NOT fly with the IRS.
Jimmy Greenfield: If Bela Karolyi had a co-starring role on “Joey” it would still be on the air.
Tracy Swartz: U.S. biggest Olympian isn’t Michael Phelps … it’s Crystal Bustos!
Leo Ebersole: That life’s greatest moments are preceded and followed by hours of commercial breaks.
‘That Guy’: The key to a woman’s heart is through your Speedo.
———-
plthompson@tribune.com
jgreenfield@tribune.com
tswartz@tribune.com
lebersole@tribune.com
redeyesports@tribune.com
