Candy bars and haunted houses are fun and all, but we know the real reason adults spend so much time squeezing into last year’s Superman tights on Halloween: the potential for hooking up. Soon enough, bars around town will be filled with naughty librarians, devilish angels and sexy gladiators on the hunt for an ill-advised encounter. So you don’t get shot down before you can say “Hey baby,” we’ve honed in on the likely prospects at four parties, plus a second stop to further your chances. The rest is up to you.
Dark Wave Disco Halloween
Sonotheque, 1444 W. Chicago Ave. 312-226-7600
The party: DJs Mark Gertz and Trancid of The Dark Wave Disco crew take over this West Town club Friday along with guests Kid Color and L.A.-based Villains. Drink deals include $3 312 drafts and $4 Svedka vodka. 9 p.m. $8-$12.
Your prospect: A Mac guy (i.e. the Vans-wearing dude with the iPhone and $100 haircut who was too cool to dress up)
Dress as: A PC guy. Win the heart of the Mac by admitting he was right and denouncing your dorky PC ways forever. Tousle your comb-over and shed your suit to reveal a sweet graphic tee and an iPod full of Swedish remixes.
Next stop: Seal the deal by heading down the street to The Continental (2801 W. Chicago Ave. 773-292-1200), where there’s never a cover and the beats stretch on until 4 a.m.
Halloween Thing 2008
Schubas Tavern, 3159 N. Southport Ave. 773-525-2508
The party: Vie for a $250 costume contest prize at this Friday bash, where DJ Mister Wolf spins and Haulin’ Boats plays swingin’ ’70s classics. 10:30 p.m. $6.
Your prospect: Sarah Palin
Dress as: Joe the Plumber. Carry a plunger and zero in on one of the (likely many) girls or guys dressed as Palin. Break the Alaskan ice over $3 Goose Island 312 drafts by thanking her for boosting you to semi-celeb status with multiple shout-outs in her speeches.
Next stop: Whisk her away to Will’s Northwoods Inn (3030 N. Racine Ave. 773-528-4400), where the wall-mounted fish and antler chandeliers will make her feel right at home. Remember to be a gentleman by offering her your Buckeyes hoodie. It’s cold up there in Lakeview.
’80s Halloween
Martini Park, 151 W. Erie St. 312-640-0577
The party: The Spazmatics play at this Thursday costume ball with $500 for the best ’80s get-up. 8 p.m. No cover for ladies; $10 for guys.
Your prospect: Gem from the cartoon series “Gem & The Holograms”
Dress as: Lion-O from “Thundercats.” Compliment her on a “truly outrageous” outfit before offering a round to Gem and her rock-band posse.
Next stop: After reminding her what a Thundercat is (that’d be a feline/human/alien hybrid from the planet of Thundera), offer to use your “sight beyond sight” powers to gauge the line outside of The Underground (56 W. Illinois St. 312-644-7600), where you can reminisce about Saturday morning cartoons over Kool-Aid cosmopolitans ($10) and old-school ’80s and ’90s remixes after 11 p.m. You might even spot Michelle Williams of Destiny’s Child, who’ll be there celebrating her album release. $20 cover.
A Date with the Dead: Halloween Fetish Ball & Play Party
The Kinetic Playground, 1113 W. Lawrence Ave. 773-769-5483
The party: This risque Saturday party boasts a leather and latex-filled fetish fashion show, burlesque performances and ghoulish tunes by DJ Peter Propaganda and END: the DJ. 9 p.m. $25-$35.
Your prospect: Hair-extensioned, leather-wearing, comeback Britney
Dress as: Nervous-breakdown, shaved-head, wig-wearing Britney. Sweet talk your potential hookup by recounting the good ol’ days of Spears scandals: “Remember when we Frenched Madonna? That was awesome.” Or compliment her on a killer comeback. “Look at you. How’d you get so hot? I’m still a hot mess.”
Next stop: Who can hear over all those hot bodies? Promise to be a slave for her if she’ll cozy up for $7 double drafts and conversation a few blocks down at neighborhood hang T’s (5025 N. Clark St. 773-784-6000).
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metromix@tribune.com
